Michael Jackson Was Not There
A legal action brought by Joseph Bartucci, a 39-year-old man who accused Michael Jackson of sexually assaulting him in a limousine in 1984, has been dismissed by a federal judge.
A judge says he tossed out a 22-year-old kidnapping and molestation claim against Michael Jackson because the pop star proved he was miles away from where the abduction allegedly occurred. U.S. District Judge Eldon Fallon dismissed the case last Thursday. The reasons for his decision were posted Tuesday on the court’s Web site. Joseph Bartucci Jr. had claimed that he was forced into a white limousine on May 19, 1984, during the New Orleans World’s Fair, and driven to California while being molested, held at gunpoint and cut with steel wire and a razor blade. Bartucci claimed he did not recover memories of the assault until 2003.
Michael Jackson’s penis can’t teleport itself to molest children yet. Fear the day when technology will make it possible, kids.
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