Billy Bob Thorton isn’t the only crazy who wanted a taste of the luscious Angelina Jolie. World Entertainment Network News reports that a “security consultant” looking to become the next Brangelina bodyguard was arrested yesterday for impersonating a federal agent. WENN says:

Nelson Mercado, 46, of Torrance, Calif., is accused of telling Sunset Protective Services and Investigations that he was a special agent for the Department of Homeland Security and is also accused of specifically seeking “the security contract and hourly payment to provide security services” for Brangelina, according to the U.S. Attorney’s Office in LA.

Mercado is also accused of using fake credentials and a “fraudulently registered” Ford Crown Victoria with tinted windows and a police light package. He was arrested today by Secret Service agents and, if convicted, faces a maximum penalty of three years in federal prison.

That’s just like that time I put on that fake moustache and monacle and pretended I was the “wiener inspector” down at the Branson YMCA. Only, instead of being charged with using fake credentials, I was deemed “security threat” and personally escorted out of the building by the night-time janitors. On the plus side, though, I got to see a lot of wieners before they found me in the locker room. Pretending is pretty awesome.