Sarah Jessica Parker is a Slut
In the October issue of Marie Claire, Sarah Jessica Parker confesses that she was too much of a slut to wear white at her wedding.
“I wore black on my wedding day, and I really regret that. I was too embarrassed to get married in white.”
I thought she wore black on her wedding day because she was a witch, not because she wasn’t a virgin. I didn’t think witches could be slutty, what with the stink-eye and the moles and the cackling and everything. And I can’t tell you how surprised I was that her new fragrance “Lovely” smells like “flowers” instead of “eye of newt.” Because I was sure it would smell of eye of newt. Or maybe like the ground-up bones of little kids. But flowers? I never would have guessed it.
More pics of Witchy McMole hawking her perfume at Lord & Taylor after the jump.
13 Comments, Comment or Ping
sonya
No me gusta la bruja.
I’ve seen her in a couple movies, and she’s always got the bitchiest face on.
Sep 19th, 2006
petemclochness
I want to know how hollywood duped the general public into thinking she was pretty. I’ll bet she lives in a gingerbread house and everything.
Sep 19th, 2006
Italian Stallion
Those guy’s must have been pretty fucking drunk…….
To bring back one of my old Julia Roberts jokes, ok ready, ready?
And your little dog too……………
Sep 19th, 2006
Lumpy Sludge
That is one stupid looking hat in the 3rd picture!
And if she is going to wear a doily for a dress, the least she can do is NOT wear undergarments so we can peep the goods.
Sep 19th, 2006
gossipmogul
I like sara jess, she could be a slut if she wants too.
CELEBITYPUKE.com ya all!!1
Sep 20th, 2006
rumor has it...
I knew this dude in high school who was in the “biz”. He said on several occasion SJP’s husband sucked him off. I don’t doubt it! Bueller? Bueller?
Sep 20th, 2006
marie
hey all of you. im a big fan of SJP and i think she is great and she always looks good. she is an idol, for those of you who said bad stuff about her i think you have issues…. let her be… your lives are so boring that you need to make other people look bad, celebrities are human beeings too with feelings and normal lives, you should give them a break you don’t even know them well enough to judge them, and i say NEVER JUDGE SOMEONE UNTIL YOU WALK ONE MILE IN THEIR SHOES.
Jan 24th, 2007
Jeannie
Well, you’re right, but every one of you will have to bear with the fact that different amount of people have different opinions. People can’t make fun of other person’s opinion, no matter how much it sounds harsh or disagreeable. Don’t you think so? It’s quite obvious, and very commonsensable. My opinion is, is that I think Sarah Jessica Parker isn’t that bad, but I don’t know her as much as you guys do, so, it’s quite hard for me to explain my thinking logically. I hope these words made some real sense to you guys.
Jeannie
Mar 18th, 2007
Jordan
OMG! I cant beleive you’d say that about her!! Shes absolutely stunning and i bet a really nice person too! Shes great in everythin shes been in! I have to say im her biggest fan! but i cant beleive an asshole like you (whoever wrote this) would ever put something like this! What have you ever done? NOTHING! what has she done? BECAME A MILLIONAIRE! SO I SUGGEST YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Jun 19th, 2007
Melissa
Get a life you losers, dont you have anything better to do? Ugly, you are all just jealous because she is successful. She isnt a spoilt celebrity brat. Get a job and stop whinging because in the end, you making fun of her wont bring her down, it just accentuates how shallow you really are. And btw…who gives a shit what you think? So go on and have your nerdy meetings, make urselves feel good. Did i hear low self esteem?? How is she a slut also? Do you know anything about her personal life at all?
Jul 1st, 2007
Myrabelle
SJP is a great person! You don’t have to know her personally to realize that! So pls leave her alone! It’s not like you’re perfect or something, as to make fun of her! Melissa, Jordan and Marie are right!!!
Aug 31st, 2007
EVIE
SJP is not a beautiful woman. But she is a great actress. Shes really talented. She also has an amazing body. But yeah, her face is horsetastic.
Apr 8th, 2008
Alo
sjp has been advertised as beautiful by hollywood in an attempt to make ugly girls all over the world feel better about their ugliness. hopefully the dog faced cunt will gain 100pounds and then all the fat chicks can start to feel better about themselves too.
I walk down my town now and it will be full of ugly chicks wearing sjp bling, feelin great, scaring kids, this is that ugly witches fault. take her off our tv’s for the childrens sake.
Jun 22nd, 2008
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