Cameron Diaz Enjoys Intercourse
You probably assumed that actress Cameron Diaz likes to relax by flossing or maybe massaging her giant gums, but you’d be wrong. Our Ms. Diaz does the nasty to unwind. Australia’s Sydney Morning Herald quotes Cameron as saying,
“Sex is the most amazing stress reliever. I actually think it’s the best thing for everything! I think it should be 100 per cent part of everyone’s life on a day-to-day basis. We’d all be a lot happier! I love being physical, I love to get my heart-rate up and I love sweating. Sex is undoubtedly the best way to do that!”
You know, another good way to get your heart rate up is to hide naked in a church vestibule and wait until the opening song to burst from the corridors and sprint your way down the center aisle. The trick is to move slow enough for all the church-goers to get a load of your junk, but fast enough to prevent being caught. A good coating of Vaseline help defend against any suprisingly mobile front-row types. You see, Cameron? There are plenty of other ways to get naked and sweaty. It doesn’t always have to be about sex.
26 Comments, Comment or Ping
Walrus Gumboot
Beings as I haven’t had sex since 1992… sadly, I wouldn’t know.
Dec 13th, 2006
abby
I think for like $50 you can have somebody take care of that for ya, Wally!
Dec 13th, 2006
leash
Cameron Diaz likes to have sex.
No shit, Sherlock. Most people do.
Next story kthx?
Dec 13th, 2006
abby
Anybody who says “kthx” needs to have the living fuck beaten out of them on a regular basis.
Dec 13th, 2006
leash
Haha how about people who write stupid comments and stories and get sarcastic replies?
Dec 13th, 2006
Phil
Hey leash, what about a stupid Australian kid who thinks he’s being sarcastic when he’s just making a fool of himself?
Dec 13th, 2006
Zanna
Hey, leash..how about a full force kick in your genitals with a steel toed boot coverd in poison ivy? Fuck off.
Dec 13th, 2006
Phil
LOL Zanna, you beat me on this one.
Dec 13th, 2006
Zanna
I’m full of love, Phil..what can I say.
Dec 13th, 2006
Italian Stallion
How do you expect people to come back when you shit on them when they comment? You to Phil……LOL
Hey Choke-chain, you were buttfucked by a martian? That’s just weird………..
Dec 13th, 2006
Italian Stallion
Oh, and what’s up with the Grim Reaper up there? Who died? Leash?
Dec 13th, 2006
Zanna
I can’t believe you called me choke-chain. Man, I thought we were friends.
Dec 13th, 2006
Italian Stallion
Leash….choke chain….ok, now I see, not that funny…….
See what happen was………….
Dec 13th, 2006
abby
I don’t want leash to come back. It said, “kthx”! Do you really want that kind of drivel mucking up our message board? Especially when we’ve got comedy gold like “mistletoe cock-ring” and “full force kick in your genitals with a steel toed boot coverd in poison ivy?” Think about the ramifications here.
Dec 13th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
Leash is a stupid nickname!
Dec 13th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
Abby, can you loan me $55? ($5 for condoms)
Dec 13th, 2006
Italian Stallion
LOL@ Wally……you should ask for $105, hit that shit twice…………
Dec 13th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
Stallion - I don’t want to appear greedy!
Dec 13th, 2006
oshkoshb'grabmyhooters
I’m still wondering why Cameron Diaz supposedly smells like curry. Maybe I missed that day… but I’m am intruiged nonetheless.
Dec 13th, 2006
nrrvus
Carmeron has almost completed her transformation into the joker, she should just let jack tea bag her to complete it. Maybe even a little dirty sanchez as a good bye.
Dec 13th, 2006
leash
Aww you guys are so nice to me, I couldn’t *not* come back.
All my replies can be lumped into a simple sentence: ‘You’re wrong (and dumb), no thanks I like it here (cocksucker), your name makes you sound like someone who is trying to compensate for something you sorely lack, love you guys :-)’
It’s so delicious how people can be internet warriors and jump on a bandwagon just because it makes them look hard or something, when in reality you just have no clue and the internet is probably the only thing you can focus your frustrations on after a tough day flipping burgers or being on your knees for $20 a pop.
So hey, throw some more expletives in because a large vocabulary just screams intelligence and I’m surprised nobody has mentioned my mother yet? You guys are off the ball tonight…oh and don’t forget to question my sexuality, confuse my gender (already been done though) and make your judgements based on a 5 letter nickname. (Ever heard of phonetics? I bet if you did then you would understand, but there’s a lot of things you yanks just don’t understand)
Dec 14th, 2006
abby
Your mom smells like goat cheese.
Dec 14th, 2006
livvie
by the way, your site sucks and please stop copying idlyitw’s headlines. bye bye shitty site!
Dec 14th, 2006
abby
And yet you returned to leave another comment…
Dec 15th, 2006
yomama
My first and last time here. Abby, is your mom retarded? Did they have to put her down? I feel for you man, really I do. Life can get tough on you, but you just better hold on there man.
Dec 17th, 2006
sarah
well this shows what nice people are left in the world
Jan 7th, 2007
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