Lindsay Lohan Does the Stripper Thing
Lindsay Lohan is preparing for her role as a topless dancer in the new movie “I Know Who Killed Me” by taking classes in the art of striptease. Page Six reports:
An e-mail [Lindsay] sent to pals last week has the subject title: “They’re all whores, they’re all whores . . . xcept for some obviously!” Lohan wrote in the note, “So . . . 3 hours of pole dancing and bruised. everywhere . . . I mean we’re talkin’ like, UPPER AND INNER THIGH ACTION-bruised . . . like a walking black-and-blue mark. I mean really though, really, I didn’t know it was actually possible to have bruises in such areas of the body. Strippers dude, I tell you, I really respect the [cunts] now. . . I’m not gonna lie to ya.”
Sure, sure. The inner thigh bruises are from the pole, not from somebody blindy attempting to punch you in the cooter. You know, in the hopes of scaring your horrible lippy baldness away from their penis. If I had a wiener, I can guarantee that’d be my response. Turning my head the other way while flailing my fist in your general “area.” On a less disgusting note, kudos on picking such an aptly titled movie. Some other good titles would be “I Dropped My Hair Dryer in the Tub While Bathing,” “Poison Hemlock and a Cyanide Chasher,” or maybe, “I Drove Off a Cliff and the Car Burst into Flames and Flipped Over Seventeen Times End to End and Landed on Its Roof and Then Got Hit By a Meteor Before a Fault Line Opened Up and Swallowed It Whole.” I could definitely cough up $7.50 to see that.
A few more pics of a “sober” Lindsay Lohan drinking “water” en route to Teddy’s Friday night after the jump.
17 Comments, Comment or Ping
Walrus Gumboot
I reaaly am proud of the lifes path that Lindsay has chosen for herself.
Dec 18th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
I really am proud of the lifes path that Lindsay has chosen for herself, too!
Dec 18th, 2006
mike
Wait,wait.So..were gonna get to see lohan boobage flopping around on a stage? i know it sounds crazy but my penis just smiled.
http://celebriteaze.blogspot.com
Dec 18th, 2006
abby
My vagina just frowned.
Dec 18th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
It will be like that Elisha Cuthbert pornstar / no nudity movie!
Dec 18th, 2006
mike
I didnt see that,and now i really dont have a reason too.
Dec 18th, 2006
Italian Stallion
Like she doesn’t have any practice at it, what a two dollar whore………….
Dec 18th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
I didn’t see it either and I am a huge fan of Elisha Cuthberts looks!!
Dec 18th, 2006
BarbadoSlim
I never thought I’d be an advocate for anti-indecency laws on the media but there you go.
Dec 18th, 2006
abby
Censorship, baby — it’s back in a big way.
Dec 18th, 2006
Dragulf
I gave Blohan $5 for a hummer and she gave me change! Yeeeeah baby!
Dec 18th, 2006
sonya
I think I’ve heard more intelligible things coming out of my dog’s ass. My dog’s ass probably smells better than hers, too.
Dec 18th, 2006
oshkoshb'libtardsalad
How dare she defile the stripping industry. I wish the strippers would pull her off the stage and take turns drop-kicking her, and then put a hot curling iron in her vajeezy. I’ve seen it done… it smells like bacon frying…
Dec 18th, 2006
abby
Nice use of the word “cunt,” too. I’m sure strippers everywhere are delighted with her ode of praise.
Dec 18th, 2006
oshkoshb'libtardsalad
Most strippers are delighted at anything that involves a little money or a bit o’ drugs. We’re a slap-happy lot, we are. And the bruises thing is true, until your thighs become calloused and hardened like an elephant’s toe.
Dec 18th, 2006
Walrus Gumboot
Oshy - I like the “camel toe” better.
Dec 18th, 2006
Amy
Well, with friends like Paris, it’s no surprise she’s good at it.
Dec 20th, 2006
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