Stars Align for Teri Hatcher’s Uterus
Actress Teri Hatcher believes that the alignment of the planets is responsible for her newfound uterine comfort. The Post-Chronicle reveals
The ‘Desperate Housewives’ actress is a keen believer in and thinks her stars are the reason for the mysterious disappearance of her menstrual cramps and current cheerful demeanour. She [said,] “I think I’m very lucky. I don’t think they have ever been so aligned for me in my life. They’re so aligned that I’ve been having periods and not even having cramps.”
Now my car getting impounded and this genital rash make perfect sense. The alignment of the cosmos. Jupiter being in the seventh house or something like that. Not the all the sex I had with strangers or the 27 parking tickets I got and didn’t pay last month. I can’t wait to see what the universe has in store for me this year! I’m hoping “big wieners” and “luxury sedans.”
19 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
Teri Hatcher is a weird looking man baybee…
Jan 8th, 2007
RichPort
That stupid show is gonna be cancelled faster than my Cheri and Penthouse subscriptions were with the advent of free porn online. And much like I said when I discovered free porn online, about fucking time.
Jan 8th, 2007
Wally Gumboot
Abby – I believe it’s…
♫ ♪ When the moon is in the Seventh House
And Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars. ♪ ♫
Al least from what I remember from “Age Of Aquarius” days and the 5th Dimension.
http://www.lyricsondemand.com/soundtracks/f/forrestgumplyrics/medleyaquariusletthesunshineinlyrics.html
Jan 8th, 2007
Wally Gumboot
Rich, “Cheri” magazine!
I used to “read” it in my youth.
Thanks for the memory.
Jan 8th, 2007
Italian Stallion
If I had a hatchet I would definately Hatcher in her stupid alighned cunt…………….
Jan 8th, 2007
BarbadoSlim
I used to read the articles….err yes *cough* of a little british mag called High Society, great articles that covered everything from from the Unified theory of The Universe to …fisting.
good times
Jan 8th, 2007
Zanna
i suing Barbado Slim for me burning making hot coffee come out of my nose and burning my nasal passages!
Jan 8th, 2007
Butch
Uh baby doll…it’s called MENOPAUSE. No mystery there, lady. You’re so old you kweef dust.
Jan 8th, 2007
BarbadoSlim
Oh, oh, I can’t let this pass, ahem….here it goes, “they’re real, and they are craptacular”
Jan 8th, 2007
Dragulf
They are real…saggy!
Teri, cocaine does that to everyone, not just you. I know I don’t cramp during my periods anymore!
Jan 8th, 2007
oshkoshb'raspberryjam
I can’t believe people this stupid actually exist. I really wish she would get face cancer.
Jan 8th, 2007
Italian Stallion
Get?
Jan 8th, 2007
sonya
Ha ha! Its says, “SUPERFU” in the background! Even the walls are cursing you, Teri!
Jan 8th, 2007
abby
I bet her uterus is like a shriveled up old fig.
Jan 8th, 2007
Elaine
Can someone please tell me why in the name of GOD celebrities (and I use the word loosely in this case) feel the need to share stories like this? The day I start wondering if Teri Hatcher’s stars and planets are aligned to give her menstrual relief or, to be more exact, if I ever generally give a genuine shit about her, will be the day I learn what cool metal and gunpowder tastes like.
Jan 8th, 2007
bionic bunny
crap, gumbo, don’t get me started on “THE FITH DIMENSION”… maralyn mc coo and whats-is-name.
remember their other hit, “would you like to fly (in my beautiful balloon)?”?
i’ll bet you can also quote flip wilson comedy bits.
we’re OOOOLLLLLLLLLLDDDDD, gummy, OLD!
Jan 9th, 2007
bionic bunny
FIFTH, DAMMIT, FIFTH!
Jan 9th, 2007
Wally Gumboot
Bunny – Thanks again for reminding me I’m “old”.
Jan 9th, 2007
gwid
“Wieners” Abbs? I thought you like “Chicken”?
Jan 9th, 2007
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