Despite the stringent absolutely-positively-no-leaving-’till-you’re-completely-sober policy you usually encounter at a rehab facility, actress Lindsay Lohan has managed to spend more than half of her week-long stay at the Wonderland center out on the town. TMZ reports:

…Sources say [Lindsay's] fellow residents at the Wonderland rehab facility are annoyed that Lindsay is getting special treatment. Lohan, who checked into [Wonderland] days ago, left rehab for day-trips on Monday and Wednesday as well as yesterday. On Monday, Lindsay left for her condo. On Wednesday, spies spotted her at Newsroom Cafe having lunch with friends. And of course, yesterday’s field trip.

Leslie Sloane Zelnik, Lindsay’s high-powered publicist, told TMZ, “This isn’t the Betty Ford Clinic, it’s not a lockdown facility. There is personal time. All these naysayers who keep blogging and speaking out, like the ‘Today’ show, they don’t know what she’s going through, they’re not there. They shouldn’t speak until they’ve gone through something like that.”

Well, I have been through rehab, so I can say whatever the hell I want about it. You know, when I was in there, they never let me lunch with pals or take my Mercedes out for a spin. I had to ask permission to take a dump, for Christ’s sake. I even had to give the security guards blow jobs when I wanted to get out and score a little coke. Oh, wait… it’s all making sense now, isn’t it? Nothing buys you a little “time off for good behavior” like parking on your knees in the men’s bathroom.