Eminem’s Wife Attempted Suicide
If you think just being forced to listen to Eminem’s music is punishment enough, try being married to him. Ex-wife Kim Mathers claims that he drove her to try to commit suicide. TMZ reveals:
After going to one of her husband’s concerts, Mathers was shocked to see Eminem’s public display of hatred toward her and the audience’s positive response to it. “He was singing a song that was about me and he had a blow-up doll up on stage that looked like me and he was physically beating it and kicking it,” says Kim, “Seeing the crowd response and everybody cheering, singing the words and laughing … I knew that it was about me, and that night I went home and I tried to commit suicide.”
If only she’d had the good sense to kill him instead. Maybe tried some arsenic or some napalm or something. Then we’d never have to hear “Lose Yourself” ever again! Just think about it. Violent crime would probably drop 42% in the first month alone (doesn’t most of his music made you want to hurt something?), the Palestinians and Israelis could finally find peace, and the unicorn would make its triumphant terrestrial return. That goiter I have on my neck would finally go away. I bet the third nipple would, too. There’s no doubt about it: the world would be a better place without that douchebag in it.
12 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
pfffffffffffffffft, “attempted suicide,” means you’re not trying hard enough honey.
Feb 15th, 2007
Dragulf
Next time, bitch, shoot him first THEN youself!
Feb 15th, 2007
leash
What a way to lose at death as well as life…
Feb 16th, 2007
oshkosh
Wally, any advice for Kim?
Feb 16th, 2007
sonya
Speaking of unicorns, the 25th anniversary edition of The Last Unicorn is out. Don’t pretend you didn’t love that movie to death when you were little, girls.
Feb 16th, 2007
bionic bunny
dang it. sonya..
there are so many times i want to quote that movie!!
my eldest LOVED that movie, and at least it had “america” (the band) doing the music, so it wasn’t too freaking annoying!!
UNIEE-CORN! UNIEE CORN!!!
Feb 16th, 2007
Desiree
Fuck all u guys kim is a fucking bitch.the world would be crap if eminems music wasn’t in it.maybe if she didn’t try to commit suicide her daughters wouldn’t be going throgh hell that fat uglyass whore needs to get it threw her head she’s not a fucking millioanire any moer because she made her husband hate her
Feb 23rd, 2007
gen
fuck you man. i love eminem. kim is such a bitch.
Jan 26th, 2008
jon
fuckin bullshit
Apr 13th, 2009
jon
Shes a fuckin bitch. also fuck you
Apr 13th, 2009
cj
i LIKE eminem. so fuck u guys and fuck her 2
May 31st, 2009
not important
that sucks. i feel sorry for them both (Eminem & Wife)
Jul 27th, 2009
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