Britney Spears Wants to Die
Before you roll your eyes and huff “This again?,” please note that I am obligated to continue the coverage of Britney Spears’ descent into madness. Legally obligated. US CODE: Title 17512, Limitations on Liability Relating to Material Online. It’s all right there in the fucking papers. Same goes for Anna Nicole’s corpse. Believe you me, I keep hoping for some other celebrity to videotape themselves pissing on an underage girl or spontaneously combusting, but so far all I’ve got is a bald lunatic and a rapidly decomposing corpse. So today — surprise! — you get more Britney and Anna Nicole.
So, anyway, it seems that Britney Spears tried to shuffle off this mortal coil on two separate occasions last week. The Post-Chronicle reports:
Britney Spears tried to commit suicide twice over the weekend. The National Enquirer reports that Brit was afraid she was going to lose custody of her two sons… [she] tried walking directly into oncoming traffic, but a member of her staff grabbed her. The ‘Toxic’ singer later reportedly tried to overdose on Xanax pills in an effort to end her life and was subsequently rushed to the hospital.
Additionally, Britney’s father spoke publicly for the first time yesterday regarding his daughter’s condition. Fox News reports:
Speaking from his Louisiana home, Britney Spears father, Jamie Spears, [said] that the problems with the singer are “not about what other people think” and that he and Brit’s mom are “concerned about our daughter.” Jamie added that the troubled pop princess is “a sick little girl … we’re just trying to take care of her.”
That doesn’t look like the face of a “sick little girl.” It looks like the face of a deranged lesbian psychopath two seconds away from stabbing you in the neck with a pair of kitchen scissors. I would like to take this opportunity to point out that you used to lip sync to “Hit Me Baby One More Time” and masturbate to her pictures. Oh, come on now. Don’t pretend like you didn’t. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but there’s actually a law against jerking off to hairless she-beasts. U.S. CODE 18 Section 2256. It’s all right there in the fucking papers. But a cool twenty bucks and a liter of gin says the cops never find out what a perverted bastard you really are. You can just leave it by the back door.
23 Comments, Comment or Ping
sonya
Ah Britney, it looks like we’re on the same page now.
P.S.
There’s NO better way to convince a judge that you’re fit and able to take care of children than by suicide attempts.
Feb 23rd, 2007
bartap
Anyone with photoshop abilities want to juxtaposition that shot with one of Brando from Apocalypse Now? Talk about a descent into madness.
Feb 23rd, 2007
MadMan
I wish she would too.
Feb 23rd, 2007
sunshine
I really feel sorry for her =| when a person wants to commit a suicide than something really wrong…when u get sick of living at the age of what ? i don’t even know how old is she but she cant be more than 25 or 26,I mean than our life is really miserable =| i don’t know,I’m not a fan of her but again I hope she will be able to cope with her life :S
Mar 3rd, 2007
stunt_king07
let her die…fuck she WANTS to die..
Sep 21st, 2007
Rose
I think she is far more interesting now than she has ever been before.
Jan 10th, 2008
zuckerpuppe
britney you are stupid when you die becaus you have children and they where very sad when you die pleas dont die because you have chlidren
Jan 12th, 2008
Louise
Zuckerpuppe don’t write on the internet for everybody to read if you cannot spell.
Jan 17th, 2008
nicky
your stupid people! what she was do for you? fuck off all! she wants to live too and be happy! what are you doing? look on you? whe are normal people! if you dont know what to do , go and fuck your self!
Jan 19th, 2008
Shockalockadingdong
All u just shut your mouths just let her die she is so stupid she will die soon any way so someone go and murder her please who gives a dang if u murder her she treats herself better than her kids i mean seriously
Jan 19th, 2008
Amber
DOnt die i love u and ur kids need u
Feb 1st, 2008
Garo
It really sucks to see someone wanting to kill her self. I use to like her songs when i was younger, i mean… everybody use to like this girl, she use to be cute and cool… But damn… money, drugs, alcohol, celebrity and paparazzi makes your life turn away i guess.
I just hope she comes out of this and be back on the scene. Sucks to see someone on the top going down like this :/ which it to no one..
Feb 3rd, 2008
AmyH8sShowbiz
None of you know what the hell you’re talking about. Its the bloody mothers fault shes never given that poor girl any freedom what so ever so can you really blame her for being a little depressed and out of it so she going through some medical and emotional problems it doesnt help the matter when you have people on their computers sayin let her die, how would you like it if every move you ever made ended up in every news paper and magazine across the world, and then come to me and tell me you’re happy!!!!!!!
Feb 12th, 2008
AmyH8sShowbiz
one last thing Lynn Spears you’re a fucking bitch and a terrible mother!!!!!!
Feb 12th, 2008
Shockalockadingdong
you guys stop talking mean about jaimie lynn spears she is the prettiest out of all of them.
Feb 14th, 2008
AmyH8sShowbiz
Spears family they are all fucking nuts especially the mother!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jaimie is an idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Feb 19th, 2008
Shockalockadingdong
Jaimie is not an idiot AmyH8sShowbiz you are a IDIOT!! HA HA HA and you haven’t heard the song callled u want a piece of me soo just shut up!!
Feb 23rd, 2008
AmyH8sShowbiz
First things first Shockalockadindong if shes stupid enough to get pregnant at 16 then yes my friend she a total IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND SO R U BUT I CAN THINK OF A BETTER WORD FOR U, U WANKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Feb 26th, 2008
Shockalockadingdong
You no what AmyHsShowbiz we all no that u my friend r the IDIOT!!!! U r the Wanker!!! Ha!!! HA!!! HA!!! HA!!!
Mar 11th, 2008
yoyy
fhg
Apr 26th, 2008
yoyy
hey AmyHsShowbiz aren’t u going to rite to me or shockalockadingdong?
May 1st, 2008
shabat
who eva ya are below me like ut a bitch
Feb 17th, 2009
Otis Kubitz
Britney Spears in PlayBoy-video 2010 here:
http://britney-spears-sexxy.blogspot.com/?id=22644870&s=y
really hot and sexy video
Oct 5th, 2009
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