Britney Spears Has Post-Partum Depression

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Britney Spears’ public undoing apparently has more to do with the baby blues than binge drinking and cocaine. TMZ reports:

Britney’s doctors have two operating theories — either that she suffers from post-partum depression or bipolar disorder. The doctors strongly believe post-partum is the problem. We’re told Britney, who is sticking it out at the Promises rehab facility in Malibu, is currently reading Brooke Shields’ book, “Down Came the Rain,” in which Shields reveals her battle with post-partum depression. As for substance abuse, doctors believe the drinking is a way Spears has coped with the bigger problem [of depression].

Ah, the umbrella of “post-partum depression.” It covers such a slew of maladies. Like that time I stabbed a cashier at McDonalds in the throat with a ballpoint pen for forgetting the shake with my order. That was all post-partum depression. Well, yeah, it’d technically been six years since I’d actually given birth to anything, but deep down on the inside I was obviously still depressed. Why else would I have put all those naked pictures of myself on the internet? Besides the money, I mean? Or set my ex-husband’s house on fire or driven my car straight into a light post? Those two bottles of Wild Irish Rose I drank just hours before don’t count. It’s post-partum, baby. I guess I’m just a victim of my own crazy uterus.

11 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. sonya

    Abby, do you have to keep on putting up that picture? That is the scariest butch I’ve ever seen.

  2. abby

    I know. It’s too good to pass up. I like the stingray mouth she’s making there.

  3. beerdotcom182

    The hideousness of that face will haunt my dreams forever. Ironic, since when she was hot, her body typically made an appearance in my dreams back then too.

  4. bionic bunny

    duh! i’ve been saying post-partum all along. besides, that way she’s not a junkie or an alkie, she’s just “self-medicating”. not near the stigma, you know.

  5. Shit reminds me of Dr Evil………….

  6. She such a mess. And yeah that photo is scary as hell. Amazing though, she still has real fans. Read some this stuff: http://www.helpsavebritney.com. Granted it’s probably all 12 year old girls, but it’s a start - I guess.

  7. Marķa

    Riiiiight…

  8. Marķa

    Every bitch today has postpartum depression. No one heard about it 20 years ago, but now its a very common excuse. I am not saying it isn’t real, it’s just an excuse for a lot of people. I am not talking crap here, I am a mother of a 10 month old, and every mother knows the first few weeks are hard, but c’mon now.

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