Britney Spears All Fixed Now

Break out your suit jackets and your boutonnieres, boys, because Britney Spears is heading out of rehab. According to TMZ:
Britney Spears will be leaving rehab this week… Sources say Britney and soon-to-be ex Kevin Federline are not only getting along, they are hammering out the terms of custody. She and Kevin have agreed to a 50/50 split with physical custody of their two children.
That’s too bad about the rehab bit, because Britney really seems to have found some soul mates while at Promises. Female First reports:
Britney Spears and an unnamed man also receiving treatment at the Promises clinic were found frolicking in the folliage of the grounds and had to be separated by security staff. A source [said]: “Britney and her new male friend had sneaked off into the bushes and were getting pretty passionate. They weren’t actually having sex but there was definitely some groping. We had to step in to separate them. They were told off. They’re in rehab and relationships between vulnerable people aren’t really encouraged.”
No, because the labels “bald” and “co-dependent” and “paranoid” and “emotional eater” offer you so many options outside of rehab. Really, add “Hepatitis C” and “lives with mother” to the list, and the world is pretty much your relationship oyster. Why limit yourself, Britney?

6 Comments, Comment or Ping
sonya
Yuck, that dude must’ve been REALLY hopped up on pills to want to get it on with Britney. Or maybe he’s just forgotten what women are supposed to look like.
Mar 20th, 2007
Zell
“I’m better, y’all!”
Good lord, I was never a fan but how do you go from being on top to being… where she is now so quickly? And at that age to boot.
Mar 20th, 2007
bionic bunny
i’ve said it before: how in the hell can she be leaving re-hab so soon??? that’s not a cure, its a band-aid.
@zell, i think it was more of a long downward spiral. this girl has been in trouble for a long time, and k-fed knew how to take advantage of it.
i hope she has a good shrink on retainer, she’s gonna need it.
Mar 20th, 2007
oshkosh
She’s pretty. I want to pee on her scowl.
Mar 21st, 2007
stevie
Any bets on which club she hits first tonight?
Mar 21st, 2007
Jill
HAHAHAHAHA “Add Hepatitis C” and “lives with mother” and the worled is pretty much your relationship oyster!”
I LOVE this damn writer…HILARIOUS!!!!!
Mar 22nd, 2007
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