“Girls Gone Wild” creator Joe Francis can’t go anywhere without being violated with a dildo or getting punched in the head. Page Six reports:

A guy went wild with jealousy and punched Joe Francis in the head Saturday night at the Miami club Cameo. Francis, who’d been sipping Bacardi mojitos, was in the company of socialites Anna Anisimova and Tinsley Mortimer but paying more attention to a group of Brazilian models. The boyfriend of one of the South American sirens took offense and initiated the violence, a source said. After the assault, a weary Francis was escorted from the scene by security.

Joe Francis just has one of those faces that make you want to kick his ass on sight. You don’t even have to speak English to know the guy’s a douche — you can see it right there in his expression. I call it the “Brandon Davis-esque Visage.” All it really requires is an overwhelming sense of self-importance and a general lack of muscle tone. And a couple of super-manly actions like “sipping your mojitos” and “tucking your vagina back into your panties.” Also, try looking like you’re about to cry and/or run away at any moment. Draw from “I actually stuck my dick in Paris Hilton” and “Everybody fucking hates me” as your motivation. There! See how easy that was? You’re Joe Francis!

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