Alec Baldwin, patron saint of embittered bachelors everywhere, just had his custody rights yanked for the profanity-laced voice mail he left on his pre-teen daughter’s voice mail. TMZ reports:

After Ireland failed to answer her father’s scheduled morning phone call from New York on April 11, Alec went bersek on her voice mail, saying “Once again, I have made an ass of myself trying to get to a phone… You have insulted me for the last time. I don’t give a damn that you’re 12-years-old or 11-years-old, or a child, or that your mother [Kim Basigner] is a thoughtless pain in the ass who doesn’t care about what you do. You’ve make me feel like [shit]… This crap you pull on me with this goddamn phone situation that you would never dream of doing to your mother, and you do it to me constantly over and over again.”

Before hanging up, Baldwin warned the child, “You better be ready Friday the 20th to meet with me.”

On Wednesday, Los Angeles County Superior Court commissioner Maren Nelson heard the tape and temporarily suspended Baldwin’s visitation rights. A hearing is set for May 4, where the judge could permanently deny Baldwin visitation or contact with Ireland.

I thought the piece de resistance of Alec’s message was his not knowing how old his own child actually was. The swears were a nice touch, and he gets points for telling her how her mother doesn’t really love her, but if he really wants her to to start cutting herself and fucking every guy she meets, he needs to step up his game a little. Call her India instead of Ireland; tell her he wishes her mom hadn’t chickened out on that fucking abortion; and remind her that girls are only good for cookin’, cleanin’ and runnin’ their goddamn cock holsters. I’m afraid the route he’s going, she’s probably just end up a “suicidal emotional eater” instead of the “masochistic slut” she could be. And really, where’s the fun in that? She’d just be fat and dead, and everybody knows that the dead part gets old pretty quick.