Sheryl Crow Adopts
In the most boring celebrity news ever, frugal wiper/musician Sheryl Crow adopted a two-week old baby boy last week. According to People Magazine:
The child was given the first name Wyatt, after Crow’s father, and the middle name Steven, after both her younger brother Steven Crow and manager Steven “Scooter” Weintraub. “We are enjoying some very private family time,” Crow wrote. The singer’s rep gave no other details except that the child was born in the United States.
In similar but more interesting news, I adopted an Austrian accent over the weekend to accompany my pork pie hat and lederhosen and tried to sneak back into the Denny’s off of Highway 12. Unfortunately, the shift manager recognized me and “escorted” me out. Again. You clog a public toilet once, shame on you; twice, shame on them; and three times, shame on the fucking Big Boy Platter. I can’t help it if my bowels refuse the glory that is a $5.99 breakfast. Commies!
8 Comments, Comment or Ping
Osbourne Black
That $5.99 Dennys breakfast sho-am good. And with a side of flapjacks… Mmmmm. *smacks lips*
May 15th, 2007
BarbadoSlim
Why don’t you try a third world dictator disguise Abby, you know, sea Admiral’s Uniform with infantry medals in white, natch; over-sized Carrera sunglasses, seventies afro and full beard.
May 15th, 2007
Sorceressss
I wonder if she will limit her kid to one square?
May 15th, 2007
abby
Or use cloth diapers?
May 15th, 2007
bionic bunny
or diapers at all?
May 15th, 2007
Isa
God damn she’s fug.
May 15th, 2007
sonya
“Scare”-yl Crow.
May 16th, 2007
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Jun 21st, 2007
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