The Biggest Loser
Well, American Idol wrapped up last night with a two hour finale. Gah! I think I’d prefer a two hour unwarranted tooth drilling, sans Novocain, with a simultaneous colonoscopy. On that note, I’m sure you’re all just dying to know who won: the chick I don’t give a crap about or the dude I don’t give a crap about. Aaaaand, the winner is Jordin Sparks! (I’m being told that this is the chick.) People reports on the festivities:
The wrap-up also featured Green Day, Tony Bennett, Gwen Stefani, Gladys Knight and Bette Midler. Kelly Clarkson sang a defiant new rock song that made her sound like Meat Loaf…
Green Day and Bette Midler? Well, it’s about fucking time! And so, in one fell swoop, Green Day manages to alienate their core fan base and piss on the smoldering remains of punk rock credibility left in their career. Congratulations, guys. You’ve earned it.
As far as the Kelly Clarkson thing goes, I don’t even know what to say about that. I know a lot has been said about Kelly lately, but comparing her to Meatloaf is pretty much one of the worst things you can do to a girl, other than maybe “death by stoning.”
16 Comments, Comment or Ping
RichPort
Not long before she’s passed out in Holywood clubs after “powdering” her nose and purging a $300 salad.
May 24th, 2007
Osbourne Black
Did Clarkson sound like Meatloaf? Look like Meatloaf? Was she eating a Meatloaf? Or did her meat loaf?
These questions have to be answered.
May 24th, 2007
litelysalted
And yet I just can’t bring myself to watch one of the millions of YouTube clips of the performance. I guess we’ll never know…
May 24th, 2007
Osbourne Black
You can’t bring yourself to watch a YouTube clip and I WON’T bring myself to watch a YouTube clip.
That kind of makes us even.
May 24th, 2007
TT.Quick
A-I is for serious LOOSERS! If you actually watch American Idol, you need to get a life! It is a FIXED show….they make money on your votes that don’t mean shit! Watching 2 hours of American Idol is a total waste of your life here on Earth! I don’t see the logic in time spent watching random idiots you will never see again. Fans of the show are either over weight and ugly - or have mental disabilities and are stupid and cant think for themselves!
TT.Quick telling it like it is!
May 24th, 2007
sonya
Um, it’s LOSER. Heh heh, who’s more loserly, the loser or the person calling that person a LOOSER?
May 24th, 2007
bionic bunny
loserly?
May 24th, 2007
sonya
Yes, I acquired that word from The Wedding Singer. Movies: Not Just For Entertainment.
May 24th, 2007
RichPort
How would you know the show is fixed unless you’ve watched it, looser?
May 24th, 2007
TT.Quick
Sorry for the mispelling. I work for the President of the United States and sometimes I am so busy..I type too fast and my spellign iz noot that goood!
May 24th, 2007
Dragulf
609 Million dollars was raised by AI just from morons calling to vote…
May 24th, 2007
litelysalted
As a “professional blogger” who has blogged about AI, I feel as though I am entitled to some of that money. Or at least a free carton of Edy’s “American Idol” ice cream. I’m not picky.
May 24th, 2007
bionic bunny
i don’t watch it. and it pisses me off when it takes the “HOUSE, M.D” time slot.
that being said, what’s with the guy in the pic? he looks like he just stepped off the short bus.
May 24th, 2007
oh dear
i thank the person who pointed out the millions the show has raised for charity… at least someone acknowledges with some insight the good that can come from the show even if it is chalk full of cheese… that and to be honest i havent heard many high qual new artists come into the music industry limelight outside of american idol in the last few years… no one can POSSIBLEY argue that carrie underwood is not friggin amazing ass hot and as well nicely equiped with a strong singing voice and that daughtry dude outsold everyone last year soooo they obviously dont alll just… dissapear and never get heard from again.
May 24th, 2007
Dragulf
609M just this season as Profit for Fox’s profits. The small 5M donation they gave covers that? OK…
May 25th, 2007
U R FKD DD
NOW ”THATS” A NAPPY HEADED HO !!!!!!!!!…….CORRECTION, A FAT NAPPY HEADED HO !!!!!
Jul 6th, 2007
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