Cameron Diaz vs Jessica Biel
In what could possibly out-gay the “dance-off” as the best way to settle a score, Cameron Diaz plans to out-arrive nemesis Jessica Biel at the MTV Movie Awards in June. A source tells Page Six
“It’s becoming a big deal because the girls both want very separate arrival times. Nobody knows who Cameron is going to bring, if anyone. But if Jessica walks with Justin [Timberlake], Cameron will want to bring a date. If Jessica goes alone, Cam will probably walk alone. It’s a mess.” The biggest stars are usually the last to walk the carpet - a position both glam gals are fighting to snag. Diaz… wants to avoid the “humiliation” of having an earlier arrival time than Biel at the MTV event. The ceremony is also being carefully crafted to avoid a run-in because Diaz was nominated in the best-kiss category. “Jessica is definitely not presenting that one.”
That’s fucking stupid. I think the best way to defend your honor on the red carpet would be to stonily pull off a leather glove, finger by deliberate finger, and lightly dust your opponent’s face with it. Then have some “handler” present a pair of pistols on a red satin pillow and instruct you to walk thirty paces with your backs turned. If it’s good enough for Aaron Burr, by God, it’s good enough for two idiots fighting over some douche who thinks he brought sexy back. It sure showed the Federalist Party who was boss!
More of Sharky at the “Shrek the Third” photocall in Tokyo after the jump
9 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
First of all Cammy hasn’t been a “big” star……since……hmmmmm, uh…The Mask(?), she does cartoon voices, so she’s on the same level as Mark Hammill as far as i”m concerned, so she should arrive at 6:00am with the caterers.
Second, Biel is capable of of just body-slamming her before she pulls out her meaty and thick schlong to rape her on the spot.
May 29th, 2007
Osbourne Black
The biggest stars… The only place these two are the biggest stars is in their own overly inflated egos.
And Cameron is still as homely as ever.
May 29th, 2007
bionic bunny
aaron burr! good one abby! history geeks rock!
May 29th, 2007
beerdotcom182
Has the Joker in the new Batman film been cast yet?
May 29th, 2007
Betty
Yes, beer, Heath Ledger has been cast as the Joker. There are promo pictures up on the web if you want to take a look. His mouth is pretty creepy.
May 30th, 2007
ROBERT
YEA BABE I GUESS YOU DIDNT KNOW IM PLANNING TO MARRY YOU.SHOCKER WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOPUT THAT HOT STUFF…
Jun 1st, 2007
Waltz
Cameron is hot, but she doesn’t beat Biel.
Jun 2nd, 2007
dpttie
Jessica Biel can not beat Cameron. On the physical aspects alone, her mouth is sooohh wide it occupies her whole face. As if oral beauty is everything. and oh, she definitely looks like a horse.
Oct 14th, 2007
Jizzy
Give me a break!
I once dated a guy who got a woody when he watched The Mask!
I think they’re both great!
Aug 31st, 2008
Reply to “Cameron Diaz vs Jessica Biel”