Victoria & David Beckham in W Magazine
Victoria and David Beckham have a “sexy” spread in the August issue of W Magazine, if you define “sexy” as the pairing of a white-haired praying mantis with Billy Idol’s bastard gay brother. Which I do. I also find plastic sheets erotic. Something about the crinkling and the stale bologna smell of dessicated semen revived by an uncle’s sweaty bottom. Ah, childhood! But I digress. All I’m saying here is that with that chest wax and those bikini briefs, the only thing Becks is missing is a big set of balls resting on his chin. Posh ought to be hovering behind him, antennae waving with anticipation as she leans in to chomp off his head. Ambiguously gay sexual cannibalism — it’s so hot right now! Sure beats the hell out of “heroin chic” and “vagrant prostitute.”
18 Comments, Comment or Ping
overrated whores r bores
well said Abby, these 2 pathetic, narcissistic fake assholes make me sick and one of the reasons society is overflowing with such a Me, Me, Me culture.
If they were shot or vanished, I would doubt the only people that would miss them is the sadly mis-guided magazines and gossip networks.
Jul 12th, 2007
abby
Fact: There is one certain species of mantis, the Mantis religiosa, that can only ejaculate during the mating ritual after its head has been torn off.
Fact: This is NOT true of human males. Just so you know.
Jul 12th, 2007
Bearcat
Hes a great football player but shes not such a great singer… Shes a good mum though, she doesnt whore her kids out for a photo op , we’ve never seen her puss or anything else we’re not supposed to see. Maybe some other starlets can take a lesson from her.
Jul 12th, 2007
margaretta
Albino egotists, sucking out your souls, look away!
Jul 12th, 2007
RichPort
Why? Why must they come here? We have enough douchebags.. like 99% of the commenters on the Fish for starters…
What?
Jul 12th, 2007
PleaseTrimYourNoseHairs!
No, she doesn’t whore her kids out for photo ops, just herself…and now getting hubby into the act, too…well, he HAS to, since no one in this country really gives two shits about pro soccer….well, I guess she has to, too, since she’s a has-been fake “singer” – I put her down there with britney & the backstreet boys – manufactured crap….
in every pic I’ve ever seen of her, she has the same exact look on her face, too – that sort of hardcore look…big deal!!
Jul 12th, 2007
Jessica
Whether fake or photo whores, they’re a sexy couple. They could teach America a little something about marriage vows. Victoria stuck by her man through all the rumors of his alledged infidelity, even though inappropriate photos could have been enough for her to split. And if nothing moral comes of their American arrival, at least they had their shot!
If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t have left a comment.
Jul 12th, 2007
PleaseTrimYourNoseHairs!
Teach America what? So the guy cheated & she’s staying for the kids’ sake – it happens the same way in America already, honey.
Jul 13th, 2007
Michelle
She looks great for someone who had 3 kids and she seems like a decent parent *cough britney cough*. She’s not even THAT skinny, I’ve seen skinnier models on the runway who are nothing but collarbones and stick-arms, she looks great.
Jul 13th, 2007
Posh Princess :)
words cannot describe this man. Angel, God, Art. And this woman? A stunning split image off a guardian angel… A role model… The two combined make the hottest couple evver to roam this earth. Ladies and gentlemen, we have met Adam and Eve./..
Aug 18th, 2007
soccer playa
man does he look good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! him and his wife make a great couple and great models. besides they can do watever they feel like doing!!! its their life not yours or any other person how questions his choices. Besides who are you to judge you’re not GOD!!!! so welcome to america Beckham family and good luck with L.A. Galaxy!!!!!! Soccer #1
Aug 22nd, 2007
Harvey
Who are you to judge them? They can do whatever they want.
Dec 27th, 2008
sally
thay will be old an wringly soon enough, as great as they look now bless them
Dec 29th, 2008
sallsxx
pleasetrimyyournose hairs? who the hell is gona take you seriously?
Dec 29th, 2008
affima
love you Posh+Becks, do whatever you people can and be happy forget the world cos they are they to pull you lovely couple down.Contn your good works.
Dec 29th, 2008
Gideon
America….please take them. We brits have had enough of the both of them for way way too long. They may well be a little too sophisticated for you guys tho!
ps theyre not really that sophisticated!
Jan 5th, 2010
sweet_girl_girls
whatever with that crap….with this britney and the backstreet boys how very cloche..
Feb 19th, 2010
sweet_girl_girls
maybe from them you atros shit sophisticated life..
Feb 19th, 2010
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