Megan Fox is a Freak
Tags: Megan Fox
So you think Megan Fox is so freakin’ pretty, do you? The “next Angeline Jolie,” only with gayer tattoos and less emotional baggage? Well, I hope you’re into carnies and freaks and stumpy nubs instead of digits, because Megan Fox has some seriously fucked-up looking thumbs. Maybe there was some kind of soldering accident or maybe a bout with Rubinstein-Taybi syndrome. Whatever the hell it is, it’s hideous. Try maintaining an erection with one of those anomalies up your ass. Damn near impossible, I’d say. And I don’t even have a penis. No, really — I don’t. It’s just a testicle. One testicle. And it’s somewhere in my abdomen so it doesn’t really count. You know, since I don’t really have a scrotum or anything. The doctor just said those were just unusually large labial folds. Yeah. But what about these thumbs, baby? I’ve got the thumbs of an angel! That freak Megan Fox’s got nothin’ on me.
More of Captain Carnie arriving in London after the jump
82 Comments, Comment or Ping
Penis Mightier
I always knew I was too good for her.
Jul 17th, 2007
JohnL
So her thumb looks like a butt plug. You’re making this sound like it’s a bad thing.
Jul 17th, 2007
LOL
I Like Freaky Chicks!!!! Thing about that thumb is she always has a dildo at the ready…for them lonely nights without me…
Jul 17th, 2007
Dragulf
Sadly, no one is actually perfect.
Jul 17th, 2007
margaretta
Speak for yourself dragulf, I thumb my nose at it all…ouch!
Jul 17th, 2007
abby
LOL, margaretta — I tried to think of a way to work “thumbing my nose” into the post, but it didn’t work.
Jul 17th, 2007
rido
IF YOU WANNA SEE THE REST OF MEGAN’S TATTOOS…I SCOUTED ‘EM OUT.
HERE’S THE LINNK
http://www.maximonline.com/articles/index.aspx?a_id=7620&tst=10
Jul 17th, 2007
Dragulf
I’d like to see the rest of Megan.
That picture of her with her mouth open is HOT!
Jul 17th, 2007
miso
I have the same set of thumbs - thanks to a great aunt. Once you get over all of the teasing when you’re growing up - you realize that you have a HUGE advantage when it comes to using your thumb to cut off the end of a hose to spray other people. That, and hitchhiking. Better unusual thumbs than a fat ass or an ugly face. GO MEGAN!!
Jul 17th, 2007
Vermillion
Wow. Thumbs? I depend on you people to give me a reason not to fantasize about her and the best you can give me is THUMBS? You are fired!
Jul 17th, 2007
cristina
oh please!
shes GORGEOUS.
PERIOD. THE END.
Jul 18th, 2007
nelly
damn shes ugly as hell without all 10 pounds of makeup and bronzing gel or the obvious lip plumping crap she had on her lips trying to look like that fake lip ho-bag Angelina ho-lie yuck shes just the bottom of the damn barrel this doesn’t even look like this chick from transformers all the guys are drooling over..and shes bony as hell and people talk about Nicole Ritchie..she needs a sandwich and a thick milkshake w/extra ice cream.. yuck
Jul 19th, 2007
V. Smith
Sure, because that’s what every guy is looking at when they first see Megan Fox.
Jul 19th, 2007
abby
Mother of God, how many times have I said she’s a fox on this site? This thumb bit was supposed to be ridiculous, because save those hideous tattoos, I think she’s damn near perfect. And I have an undescended testicle, so, obviously, who am I to judge? See, that was the irony bit. Get it? The grain of sand/plank in your brother’s eye gag. Ahem. Sometimes it’s like writing for a bowl of fucking mice.
Jul 19th, 2007
jack
wanna see more of “these girls”?
go looking for tory mussett or ashley lynn cafagna …
n-joy!!
Aug 4th, 2007
Jasmin
who ever wrote this is a fuckin loser - they’re just jelous cus they look nothing like her - your bashing someone on their thumbs? - your a fuckin idiot!
Aug 7th, 2007
LLAA
WTF?!?!?!?! I smell a fat-ass ugly ass man who is just hated on a VERY beautiful girl, I see she has money and yo bitch ass broke and writing about her thumbs and she dont even know yo wack ass. You a lame so go jack off to yo japenese anime cartoons bitch
Aug 10th, 2007
april
HAHA!!! people are taking this serious ..what dopes.
yer awesome abby!
Aug 14th, 2007
ashley
wow you losers are seriously making fun of megan fox’s thumbs. you have no life.Megan fox is gorgeous and the girls that are bashing her are jealous because they dont look like herandthe guys are mad because they can’t get girls that look as good as her.
Aug 28th, 2007
Dang....
If she were giving me a handjob and I saw those nasty thumbs I would totally throw-up all over her face. I don’t care what anybody says, stuff like that on a hot girl is totally depressing and makes me want to vomit. Its like a pretty girl with big ugly feet, sick sick sick!!!
Oct 11th, 2007
Mallory
I have the same thumbs and guys tell me I am gorgeous all the time. What makes anyone elses thumbs the right thumbs to have. This is ridiculous that people can think someone is disgusting because their thumb nail is shaped differnt than other peoples. It must be hard to be so goddamn perfect like the author of this article.
Nov 6th, 2007
lahlah
OMG! and i thought i was the only one in this world! my thumbs are fricken exactly alike hers its almost scary! i get made fun of my thumbs all the time but in a good way and most of the crap i get baout my thumbs is from my boyfriends! what does that tell you? i get told all the time how cute my thumbs are. here you have an incredibly gorgeus girl and all you can make fun of is the shape of a thumbnail and suddenly your turned off? you people are sick as fuck
Nov 7th, 2007
gg
Ok, so this was supposed to be written as a joke? I came across this tonight, and i honestly did feel bad, because first - I couldn’t believe that someone would put her down like this over her thumbs! Second, I have thumbs like this as well. It’s probably more common than people think. Anyway, if this post was meant to fool people - you did a great job, because it reaks of cruelty. I’m not saying you’re cruel, but the post really sounded this way. I’m thankful if you are joking, and i just hope that people (those who do make fun of her for it) will grow up and learn what is important in life.
Dec 9th, 2007
sam
whoever made the title “megan fox is a freak” is probobly someone that is pretty ugly themselves cuz its a THUMB!! who gives a shit! no one can even really notice somehitng like that. definately over reacting to call her a freak. shes prolly 10 times more gorgeous than you, yah fucking idiot!
Dec 30th, 2007
gina
r u serious?? a freak?? overreacting much!! i have the same thumbs and as i read up there ^ a lot of others do too. plus ive seen at least 10 other people with that type of thumb too. they are a lot more common than you think. who gives a shit ne way. do u really think that a girl as gorgeous as megan fox could not give a guy an errection cuz of the shape of her thumbs!! yer fucking RETARTED!! if ashton kutcher had those type of thumbs id still bang the shit outta him!! yer FUCKEDDD!!!! (whoever made heading “megan fox is a freak)
Jan 2nd, 2008
Dan
What fucking shallow asshole makes an article like this? I’ll have you know that clubbed thumbs originate from the genetics of the English Royal Family, and have been noted in history as a sign of purity. I have clubbed thumbs and they are rare and beautiful.
Go find something original about YOURSELF, sad twat.
Jan 7th, 2008
Amy
I have the same thumbs. They are sweet!
Jan 17th, 2008
Michella
Omg.., my teacher’s thumb looks just like that.., and she actually has some kind of abnormality(but i cant remember what it is called).., its a serious condition.., she told my class about it once..
Jan 23rd, 2008
Tyler
This was obviously written as a joke… Learn humor people.
But on a serious note, most of her tattoos (especially the Marilyn Monroe one) are ridiculous. First of all, why put tattoos in a visible place when you make your living as an actor? Secondly, tattoos are a big turn off for me (I realize some people like them). Thirdly, why Marilyn Monroe?!
Jan 25th, 2008
jesl one
dam, those thumbs are fucken very unattractive.
Keep those things away. The tattoos rock, but those thumbs
will never go near my cock….
Feb 26th, 2008
Uncle Buck
The best thing is the guy on the right in the last photo trying to hide like he doesn’t want to be associated with Megan Fox !!!!!!!!
What’s his story?
Apr 24th, 2008
Pat
http://www.a1celeb.com/megan-fox-topless-pictures.html
Woohoo!
May 20th, 2008
Viola
YOU ABSOLUTE TURDFACES! you cannot be serious - as if she can help having those thumbs, shes way more famous than you will ever be you cockmunch! You spand way to much time on the internet and following other peoples thoughts! NO BODY CARES SICK FACES!
Jun 4th, 2008
kit
She has a deformity called ‘clubbed thumbs’. The thumb and nail is abnormally short and wide and balloon out from the joint instead of tapering like normal thumbs do. The condition is also called ‘toe thumb’ and has been linked to several diseases although someone can have one or more clubbed thumbs and not be prone to disease. They really are freaky looking.
Jun 6th, 2008
Regina
You are pathetic!!! Nobody’s perfect!!! She’s still super hot and you are just jealous you can never get someone like her….Idiot!!!! Get a life!!!
Jun 29th, 2008
Polkadots
Pffft they’re not THAT bad! She’s still hot. Besides, who’s paying attention to her thumbs? All that hotness is up on her face!
Jul 7th, 2008
Josephine Buduior
her thumb looks like my vagina with a fucking toe painted on it!!!
Aug 29th, 2008
Ally
Ur Right Abby, Its like “writing for a bowl of fucking mice”. Honestly, i think the global obsession with everyone having to be perfect is ridiculous! Have you ever picked up a trash mag????? EVERYONE OF THESE SUPPOSEDLY PERFECT PEOPLE LOOK PRETTY AVERAGE ON A NORMAL DAY! They all have it; cellulite, pimples, too large, too thin, bad hair days, strange anomolies (webbed toes, third nipples… EVEN UNDESCENDED TESTICLES). Why is everyone so interested??? Oh, How hypocritical of me…. Why did i end up reading this??? i clicked on a link, then another link, then another random link… and here i am… Oh the internet is such misleading web of lies!!! lol, oh and totally… WHAT IS THAT GUYS STORY????
Nov 9th, 2008
LRm216
Wouldn’t the world be wonderful if we could each choose all of our parts before being born! I hardly think picking on her thumbs is fair, as she certainly cannot control the genes she inherited. Boo - to you. Not a fair shake.
Nov 21st, 2008
o rly
HA! None of you would be saying anything nice if this were any other celeb but because it’s OMGZZZ HOTT megan foxxxxxxx!!!111! no one can make fun of her. Everyone’s fair game…
I knew a girl who had thumbs just like these, and hey, if you have them too I am truly sorry for you… because they look like fucking toes. And that’s gross. Yeah, I know. The truth hurts.
Nov 22nd, 2008
GG
^ So what? There are many conditions or abnormalities that can seem ”gross” only because you’re not used to them - but then you realize that it’s nobody’s fault and there’s no point in making fun of a person for having something slightly different. And I don’t care if it’s Megan Fox or someone else. No one’s perfect, you deal with it.
Nov 22nd, 2008
Liz.
The only thing that is bothering me is that this ugly 6-head is supposed to be the next Angelina Jolie. WTF! Never in a zillion years could she be any more gorgeous than Angelina Jolie.
Dec 7th, 2008
Jumbie
ok, really?
Yea, i have the same thumbs….yet i’m constantly told that i’m one of the prettiest girls people have seen…
For some reason, this ‘thumb condition’ affects some very gorgeous people (like Anne Heche and Megan Fox) But nonetheless, it’s ONE flaw. The rest is beautiful….so….
i suggest people get over it.
Dec 19th, 2008
DaDa
the girl is fuckin’ sexy. She is still making er millions with tha freakish thumbs ya idiot
Feb 4th, 2009
tyg
i’d fuck her til my dick broke
Feb 25th, 2009
Chase Bano
I’d hit it like a drunk driver.
Mar 4th, 2009
Koqstrong
You are out of your mind son. That just gives her more to grab me with….
Mar 4th, 2009
hahaha
more to grab you with? wouldn’t it be less since she has stumpy thumbs?
those types of thumbs have always creeped me out. not to say i wouldn’t mushroom stamp her, but i couldn’t ever be with a girl with stump thumbs. now all you do gooders out there can whine and bitch about how mean i am for feeling that way, and say that i dont date hot girls or whatever you need to feel better about yourself, but that doesn’t change the fact that its creepy
Mar 27th, 2009
Well...
Erection happily maintained.
Protip: No one cares about Megan Fox’s thumbs.
Apr 2nd, 2009
annonymous
u r a friken freak. who the hell givs a dam about her thumbs, i hav the same type on both hands, and all i can say to u is grow up u son of a bitch coz all ur doing is putting ppl down. i bet ur one fugly ass dude who is just deppressed dat u cnt hav her. grow up and accept difference in the world. if u cant accomplish that, go and do evrywun a favour by living i a whole where we dnt hav to see or hear any of your comments.
Apr 6th, 2009
jim
there just fucking thumbs wtf
May 7th, 2009
Ugh
Wow, some of you people are just douchebags. It’s a genetic condition called brachydactyly type d, about one in a thousand people have it. No need to be a jerk about it. I think it’s great that she’s not ashamed of it and still went on to be a famous actress, and she is quite pretty.
May 21st, 2009
Terry
Wow what a sick fuck to to go to such lengths to take the time to write an article like this about such a fine woman!
You must have some deep seated bitterness…you must have been dumped by some cute girl who had thumbs like this!!! Hahaha…she moved on and never looked back at a fucking weirdo like you (and rightfully so!) and you didn’t. Get over it Bud!!!
May 24th, 2009
Johnny G
Okay, let me touch on some of these comments….
1. Miso - “I have the same set of thumbs - thanks to a great aunt……you have a HUGE advantage when it comes to using your thumb to cut off the end of a hose to spray other people…”
HAH, that’s one of the best things i’ve heard in a while: especially in response to something like this. Also, you can’t thank an AUNT for those thumbs, because you’re the product of your mother and father. It came from that great aunt’s mother or father, whom you are directly linked to in the blood line.
2. llaa - “I see she has money and yo bitch ass broke and writing about her thumbs and she dont even know yo wack ass.”
Obviously “llaa” is black, and as usual, someone dumb enough to bring the money issue into the picture… which has NOTHING to do with her thumbs being fucked. Don’t assume yo’ own destitute situation on everyone else.
3. viola - “YOU ABSOLUTE TURDFACES…NO BODY CARES SICK FACES!”
Other than the word “cockmunch” you used, the only thing more pathetic than those who use the word “douche” in any form, or those who attach ridiculous words to the word ‘FACE’, are the people who use the words… so calm down. Secondly, you also mentioned how the poster will never be as famous as her — which is just as bad as the quote above from “llaa” talkin about how the poster must be broke. Let’s be serious — your own fears about being famous DO NOT have anything to do with those you knock.
Yes, it’s sad people are this judgemental to make this much fun, but it’s reality. Don’t blame the product of the media.. blame the animal itself which consumes everything and everyone — the media itself. Her thumbs are fucked, but it’s sad people make fun. To those I quoted, you only give us a glimpse into your own insecurities from your posts. R.I.P.
Jun 9th, 2009
paul nelson
alright all of you people can just shut the f%ck up and go about your lives, so her thumb is supposedly “f%cked up” so what everyone has flaws and if we didn’t the world would end as we know it… and all the people sayin stuff like “I always knew I was too good for her” or “I Like Freaky Chicks!!!! Thing about that thumb is she always has a dildo at the ready…for them lonely nights without me…” yall need to get a life and leave such a gorgeous girl like that the f&ck alone
Jun 10th, 2009
payson
who gives a shit about her thumbs, she could have no thumbs and she would still b one of the hottest women alive.
Jun 12th, 2009
Kid Twist
None of us are perfect but she’s real close. She’s self-conscious of her odd thumbs, so what! I think most guys that aren’t “thumb fetishes” would give her a pass!
Jun 12th, 2009
JdP
BFD, DumbShits!… the girl’s an ass but this is not the “flaw” you should all be fixating on. How about the whole “persona” she and her publicists have whipped up that she is some kind of rebel. NOT. What is so maverick or rebellious about this product of the mainstream, lowest-common-denominator pop culture machine? Her silly tattoos? Or that she is a brunette? Has she done anything valuable w/ her unearned fame like speak out for or promote an important cause (like a real maverick/rebel does)? NO! Why don’t you focus on the fact that she has fake boobs and is full of shit instead of fetishisizing her stubby thumbs?
Jun 12th, 2009
hunnybunz
shes stil really pretty
Jun 12th, 2009
mark moore
She is pretty , but that really is a thumb like a big toe. Wow. But , as has been said before , “There is no Excellente Beauty which has not some Strangenesse in the Proportion”.
Jun 13th, 2009
Baiter
not gonna stop anyone from masterbaiting !
Jun 14th, 2009
Brittany
i have the same thumbs as her and hate them lol everyone always makes fun of them saying they look like big toes
Jun 15th, 2009
Chrissy
Eww i never noticed
Jun 15th, 2009
H to the W
For get the thumb, I can live with that. The question is; why do all these beautiful women have to tat themselves up. That just ruins the God given beauty with manmade crap!
Jun 17th, 2009
Amanda
Why are we sitting at our computers reading and writing about somebody’s thumbs? I feel like an idiot for even googling the Transformer movie, now. I don’t know what’s worse……this or all the crap about Twilight. I think I’ll shutdown my computer for awhile.
Jun 18th, 2009
formulabill
Wow a website for pathetic people. As though any of you over weight zit covered fucking fan boys have anything to complain about. Go back to your mothers basement and find someone else to jerk off to if the thumbs put you off.
Jun 22nd, 2009
Stephanie
i have THE SAME THUMB AS HERS…..SHe is noT a Freak
Jun 23rd, 2009
yoi
The thumb is ok. What turns me off is knowing she f***** Brian Austin Green.
Jun 24th, 2009
Macteamino
YOI you have no idea about how much i agree with you!
Jul 1st, 2009
Kat
Wow I never even noticed the thumbs before, ok so nobodies perfect, but i personally feel that Megan Fox is nowhere near. I dont give a shit about her thumbs thats not her fault. What bothers me is that she’s too fucking skinny, she’s all bone and it looks awful, really awful. Now THAT is her fault, she sould fucking eat! Seriously what does she eat every day? A piece of celery for breakfast and a tissue for dinner? I’m not saying that because I’m self conscious or jealous, whats the point in being jealous of someone i’ll never meet and who’ll probably break like a twig if you pushed her? I’m saying this because it’s the truth. She’s underweight and looks ill, it gross. It’s more gross than her supposedly gross thumbs and even worse tatoos. If I ever meet her, I’ll shove a double cheeseburger down her throat along with some weight gain 5000!
I posted this why? Because I’m bored and felt like it.
The End
Jul 2nd, 2009
Norm Digger
Reptilian shape shifter.
Jul 5th, 2009
Mambo
I like the fact that this joke is taken seriously by so many people! Anyway, I really like girls with thumbs like this and noticed Megan’s when she was sat in the car in Transformers - the reason they’re good is during a handjob, as the end of a thumb like this can more easily work the pressure points which increase the orgasm intensity, in the same way as a thumbring does. I knew a girl at uni who was like this but much more accentuated - like each thumb had a marble inside the end and damn she knew how to use them! And just for the record she was as hot as hell. But despite this, some people will still be immensely superficial and shallow!
Jul 20th, 2009
Mr Phish
ok. so the fuck what if she has clubbed thumbs?? i was born with clubbed feet. but im surgically normal now. haha.
everyone loved Marilyn Monroe and she had webbed feet. imperfections are apart of everyone.
ever the transgender heshe who wrote the start of this article.
fuck haters…….. shes hot!
Jul 23rd, 2009
PoorOldEdgarDerby
You’re not a very nice person, Nut Tummy.
Aug 15th, 2009
chelseatoosexyforyou
Ahh But I have a short thumb too! It must just be a trait of beautiful, smart women like me and Megan. Sorry you arnt as lucky! XD
Oct 27th, 2009
chelseatoosexyforyou
Opps, cant type today!
Oct 27th, 2009
Laura
Who fucking cares about her thumbs she’s hot as hell ! and I don’t have a penis but if i did i’d fuck her.You know what I don’t need a penis i still would without one! but I am glad to know theres people out there who think true beauty is dependent on your hands.
Jan 22nd, 2010
Laura
but thats just my opinion lol
I would turn lesbo for her in a SECOND !
Jan 22nd, 2010
Laura
I want her body haha
Jan 22nd, 2010
Laura
and jsuk i know your joking but i cant believe how many people really think that shit
Jan 22nd, 2010
Anthony
I don’t give a damn if she’s got clubbed thumbs. I’d hit that from sun up to sun down! I know this article is tongue in cheek, but women are soooo desperate to find something wrong with her, that this “defect” is gold I tell you. Gold!
Feb 9th, 2010
itty bitty thumb
LOL, my MIL has those same thumbs, and believe me, the older she’s gotten the bigger they get. Pretty soon, her thumbs will be the size of a hobbits foot.
Feb 9th, 2010
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