Britney Spears Ain’t OK
Britney Spears’ latest attempt at image-salvaging was of course a colossal failure. According to TMZ
Britney’s self-arranged photo shoot and interview with OK! Magazine was a complete disaster. We’re told that [Britney's] photos are so bad, execs at the magazine are trying to decide whether to report what actually happened, or sanitize the truth to protect the pop trainwreck.
According to multiple sources, Britney’s behavior during the interview was “nothing less than a meltdown.” She was, according to our sources, “completely out of it” during the shoot. The photos are “so bad”… that to publish them could “kill her career.” Brit Brit’s eyes rolled back in her head at one point, causing her to look half dead. Her mood… was extremely erratic. She took frequent bathroom breaks and each time she returned her mood would change. She was also completely paranoid during the entire interview, fearing at one point the ceiling was about to cave in on her.
But wait! There’s more.
Brit had some issues with hygiene on the set as well. At one point, Britney ordered up some fried chicken to munch on. We’re told after she chowed down, she wiped her hands on a several thousand dollar Gucci dress that she was wearing for the shoot, staining it with grease. Our on-set spy says that [her] dog pooped all over the floor, and Brit used… a Chanel dress to clean it up!
Well, at least they cleaned her up a little for the shoot, right? Um, that would be a big hell no.
As for how Brit looked for the photos, another nightmare. We’ve learned that OK! hired two of the best hair and makeup artists in L.A. to transform the once-bald beauty into something more presentable, but.. she refused to let the hired help touch her, opting instead for her “skanky friends” to do her hair and makeup.
That reminds me of the time I showed up to a job interview after a three-day drunk and pissed my pants outside the HR director’s office. I lit up a cigarette to cover the stench of my own urine and somehow started a fire in the waste paper basket, which of course set off the overhead sprinklers and the fire alarms. I didn’t wipe my ass with a Chanel dress or anything gauche like that, but it definitely wasn’t my best day. And I’m sure you’re dying to know: does smoke in fact hide the stink of urine? Yes. Yes, it does. And did I get the job? Well, this didn’t write itself, you know! Onwards and upwards, only to the top, baby!
UPDATE: OK!, despite it’s strict mantra of celebrity ass-kissing, will be publishing the undoctored interview and pictorial on Friday. They released the following statement in regard to their decision:
“OK! Magazine spent a heartbreaking day with Britney Spears and witnessed first-hand an emotional cry for help that will leave you shocked and sad. This week, on newsstands Friday, the truth will be told.”
More of Britney looking fat by her car after the jump
18 Comments, Comment or Ping
margaretta
Why won’t they just let this girl retire to her double wide and pig out on her cheetos?
Dang! It must suck to be her, wiping her nose on her gucci dress and all.
Jul 24th, 2007
abby
Skinny jeans are NOT her friends.
Jul 24th, 2007
Lindsey
i wish that someone would yank her aside and give her some real clothes to put on. that top is not real clothes.
Jul 24th, 2007
dannygutters
At least elvis could play the guitar well before he killed himself.
Jul 24th, 2007
open mouth jones
SHE’S WEARING HER PANTIES UNDER HER PANTS, PEOPLE! What more do you want? Cuz that’s about as good as it gets for her.
Jul 24th, 2007
RichPort
Funy thing is, if she was Hispanic, she would be hot.
Jul 24th, 2007
PleaseTrimYourNoseHairs!
i don’t understand why young people think that undersized clothes and underwear hanging out everywhere is sexy. You see it everywhere, and it just looks downright dumpy, tasteless, classless, etc., etc. YUCK!
Jul 24th, 2007
DiamondSal
Such a dumb loser and she is still driving with her children on her lap.. knowing the papps are following her everywhere..
Jul 24th, 2007
litelysalted
Jesus fuck.
What is it going to take for the state to take away her children? Her accidentally killing one of them?!
Jul 24th, 2007
kit
“UPDATE: OK!, despite it’s strict mantra of celebrity ass-kissing…”
Actually, it’s “…despite its strict mantra of celebrity ass-kissing…”
.
Jul 24th, 2007
Sorceressss
I cannot wait until she has another total meltdown-heh heh heh.
Jul 24th, 2007
Sean
Poor Britney. I wonder how she feels about being a walking joke. I also wonder how she can balance her chubby self in those shoe, one would think her ankles would collapse.
Jul 24th, 2007
zelda
kit: You’re a loser. If grammar-correction is all you have to boast about, hit a salon, a gym, and a club because you need to see the real world. Y’know, the one without 18 daily hrs of Tolkien and internet.
Jul 24th, 2007
nikki
…because pointing out an error automatically screams HI, I SIT ON MY FAT ASS ALL DAY, DONT TAKE CARE OF MYSELF AND SPEND MY LIFE IMMERSING MYSELF INTO THE COMPUTER SCREEN.
Jul 24th, 2007
Sean P & Jayden J
SOMEONE PLEEEEASE HELP US!!! COME RESCUE US AND CHANGE OUR DIAPERS!! BEFORE MY OTHER LITTLE BRO OR SIS POPS OUT!!
Jul 24th, 2007
whatever
HOLY CRAP, am I the only one who noticed her HAIRY ARMPIT?! it’s DISGUSTING! someone just HAS to tell her to move that fat ass and shave.
Jul 25th, 2007
open mouth jones
Whatever: we have already discussed the disgusting armpit in another post (I belive it was the one about how great a mother she is). Get with the program!
We are currently discussing how sad life must be for her underprivileged children.
Jul 25th, 2007
carla
pucha! ang itiM ng Kili-Kili!! (BLACK ARM PITS!!!)
Aug 7th, 2007
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