She Said, “No, No, NO”
Despite what we reported on Friday, it seems that singer Amy Winehouse never actually made it to rehab. News of the World reports
Amy is in hiding with husband Blake Fielder-Civil and both sets of parents at a five-star, £250-a-night hotel after last week’s hospital drama, when she slipped into a coma following a three-day drugs bender. After her discharge from hospital on Wednesday night, she and Blake were ordered to the Four Seasons Hotel in Hook, Hants, by her parents. Contrary to reports, Amy has NOT been to rehab since her overdose.
Amy’s life was saved by Blake, 25—who rushed her to London’s University College Hospital A&E at 1am on Wednesday morning. There Amy was given an adrenaline shot [after having] smoked heroin, snorted cocaine, taken ecstasy pills and horse tranquilliser ketamine and washed it down with whisky and vodka during the London pub crawl that led to her collapse.
That’s quite a list of chemicals there. Just a few liters of formaldehyde short of fucking embalming herself, I’d say. You could probably use her liver to strip paint and rust off antique furniture. That Amy sure is a miracle of science! And to think, it took six different substances before Amy needed her stomach pumped, but all it took to put Rod Stewart on the business end of an endotracheal tube was one measly gallon of semen. The difference obviously being that Rod Stewart is a dirty homo and Amy Winehouse is legally undead. I find it’s a distinction that’s just not made often enough in today’s busy world.
This moment of clarity brought to you courtesy of the responsible staff at Yeeeah! and our sponsors. And Jesus. And the six beers I had for breakfast.
More of Charlize Theron and her boobs on set of “Hancock” after the jump, because really, who wants to look at a living corpse? Nobody, that’s who.
UPDATE: Apparently, now she’s in rehab.
UPDATE 2: Wait — no, she isn’t.
UPDATE 3: Okay, she was in, but checked out after 48 hours.
UPDATE 4: I’ve stopped caring. Two months ’till she’s dead anyway.
9 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
.”…was given an adrenaline shot [after having] smoked heroin, snorted cocaine, taken ecstasy pills and horse tranquilliser ketamine and washed it down with whisky and vodka during the London pub crawl that led to her collapse….”
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Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft wimp, I thought she was there to get FUCKED UP, and she collapse after doing just that?
bah
Aug 13th, 2007
litelysalted
Gah? Is that Will Smith?
Can somebody please get the Fresh Prince away from Charlize? He’s ruining her sexy.
Aug 13th, 2007
RichPort
She’s got some huge A cups… I kid of course…
Aug 13th, 2007
Penis Mightier
Yay! Charlize!
Yay! Charlize’s boobs!
Doh! Will Smith.
The movie looked good with the Charlize and the boobs and the rowr, but then Will Smith killed it. Dead. Aw hell no!
Aug 13th, 2007
open mouth jones
Personally I’d rather look at mr. Smiths pecs than Charlize’s bee stings.
Aug 13th, 2007
JohnL
Charlize Theron is starting to look like Avril Lavigne’s non-midget twin. Looking like Fugly McFangface ain’t a good thing. (No, I’m not talking about Kirsten Dunst. Yet.) Get some help, Charlize, before you have to start working the freak shows.
Aug 13th, 2007
abby
I would kill to look like this broad. Seriously, like seven or eight people. No questions asked. Well… maybe one — would the “people” include children? Because I could maybe kill some children if they happened to be Iraqis. Okay… maybe a Rwandan kid or two, because nobody’d even miss them. But that’s where I’d draw the line.
Aug 13th, 2007
eeks
I love her, honestly. And because she is NOT a slut and is SO diverse in her characters… North Country rules.. and then Monster? And look at her above? My god, she’s a chameleon and the coolest!
Aug 13th, 2007
christian
kiss my cock and then sex……………. love you
Sep 8th, 2007
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