Nicole Richie Spends 82 Minutes in Jail
Nicole Richie served 82 minutes in jail yesterday for her second DUI arrest in January. According to People magazine
Nicole Richie served 82 minutes of a four-day sentence on Thursday due to jail overcrowding, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department. Accompanied by her lawyer and boyfriend Joel Madden, the five-months pregnant Richie entered the jail in Lynwood, Calif., at 3:15 p.m. for booking, listed at 5′1″ and 105 lbs. She was processed into the system and released at 4:37 p.m., a sheriff’s statement said.
Lucky for Nicole, she’s not black and she doesn’t have a penis. Because if she did, you better goddamn well believe she’d be spending the next year in jail, lugging around what appears to be a telephone pole in her 5′1″ 105 lb. pants and dodging child support payments. I guess God knew what he was doing when he made Nicole a spoiled little white girl. Who are we to question the Lord’s divine plan?
More of Nicole going to the gym last week after the jump
18 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
“…lugging around what appears to be a telephone pole in her 5′1″ 105 lb. pants and dodging child support payments…”
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, nah seriously, when IS the next Klan meetin’, is it still at Earl’s place?
Aug 24th, 2007
abby
No, it’s at Cracker Barrel this time. Roy’s mom said we couldn’t use the basement anymore.
Aug 24th, 2007
BarbadoSlim
Hmmmm, I reckoned as much, J.W. had told me ’bout Roy’s
Aug 24th, 2007
RichPort
I’d like to Chapelle that Klan rally if I could.
Aug 24th, 2007
Spiritualist
Nicole is black…she’s hispanic and black.
Aug 24th, 2007
RichPort
Yea, I’m Black too… right behind my zipper.
The only thing that’s ever been Black on Nicole Richie is Lionel Richie, but that was only during the summer of ‘99. After that he realized little boys just weren’t his thing.
Aug 24th, 2007
Penis Mightier
There’s no way thats accurate. If she had any black in her at all do you really think Paris would have ever hung around with her?
Aug 24th, 2007
Butch
Godamn. 105 pounds. I knew this bitch was going to get fat again.
Aug 24th, 2007
JohnL
After 82 minutes the Sheriff’s Dept. decided that it was cruel and unusual punishment. For the other prisoners. If I had to spend 82 minutes in a cell with that cadaverous incubator one of us would be swinging from our twisted bedsheets. Those horrible, horrible bedsheets.
Aug 24th, 2007
I Hate This Skank
The title of this post should have been “Celebrity Justice Makes Me Want to Punch Nicole Ritchie in the Face.” Yeah, that’s right, I’d hit a pregnant lady, she’s not carrying that fetus in her mouth. And there’s nothing wrong with being pregnant and locked up, poor people do it all the time. Ugh, the LA County penal system makes me want to vomit. And then Crackhead Lohan gets off with 1 day in jail because she’s in “rehab”. Yeah, that’s going to work out as well as it did the first two times. What is it going to take for the pencil pushers in LA County to take their thumbs out of their a**es and get on their job? A dead body? Oh, and yes, Nicole’s Black and Mexican, but she’s one of those self-hating Latinas like Jessica Alba, so she can be “White”, we don’t want her kind on our team anyway. Somewhere Paris Hilton is crying into her penis-shaped pillow and screaming “it’s not fair! I had to do my time.” Ha, stupid cum-dumpsters.
Aug 24th, 2007
sonya
That’s right, work that baby off.
Aug 24th, 2007
Dat_DoOd
complete fuckin loser.
Aug 24th, 2007
J
This is just adding the the mob of people that are getting mad a celebrities getting off the hook to easy. One day someone is going to break the camels back and I can’t wait to see what happens. You might say pairs did that but i think it can only get worse.
Aug 24th, 2007
overrated whores r bores
I just want smash her ugly pug face in with a steel baseball bat and for fucks sake, 82 Minutes?…how many cocks did she take to get that less?
What does this say to the youth?
Drink and drive and take cocaine and if you are pathetic, skinny, drug taking, insecure, ADOPTED loser bitch then you won’t really do the time.
Aug 24th, 2007
margaretta
Wow, 82 minutes must’ve been cruel for the inmates to deal with that little troll
Aug 25th, 2007
hooptie
nicole richie’s father is lionel richie who is, in fact, black. Check facts people!! She is adopted,but her parents are puerto rican and black..Sheila E’s brother is the dad.
Aug 25th, 2007
Dat_DoOd
^^^ doesn’t change the fact she WHITEWASHED as all hell. She’s about as “black” as Mr. Rodgers. c’mon, seriously.
Aug 26th, 2007
RichPort
Yea “hooptie”… I’m sure she cries everytime she sees Boyz ‘N da Hood… you know, memories and shit…
Aug 27th, 2007
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