Kim Kardashian and Jenna Jameson Are Monsters
Boy, there’s a spot you wouldn’t want to find yourself in. Being stuck between Kim Kardashian and Jenna Jameson would be a lot like standing between the Scylla and Charybdis in Greek mythology. Only instead of being a giant sucking mouth, Charybdis would just be an enormous set of lips and a big ol’ cavernous vagina. And Scylla wouldn’t have six heads, just eyebrows and sixty extra pounds of ass with which to crush your vessel. Odysseus himself wouldn’t have braved that narrow. Not without a crate of condoms and some Herpecin, anyway. Another place you wouldn’t want to find yourself? Between Britney Spears and a buffet line. Because she’s fat, see? Zing! Sorry, it can’t all be Hellenistic allusions and art terms today. That monacle was really starting to strain my face muscles.
More of the she-beasts backstage at the Heatherette Spring Fashion Show after the jump
11 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
Wow, WHAT THE HELL is my screen supposed to ooze like this….?
Sep 13th, 2007
open mouth jones
Mine broke out in hives. Or maybe they are pustules? Oh, I know, it’s pee!
Sep 13th, 2007
Otto the Short Yellow Bus Driver
Thanx for the temporary blindnes… now tell me how am I supposed to explain to the tech guys at work, why my computer is showing the Microsoft blue screen of death after viewing this and why it now needs to be quarranrined followed by a Valtrex prescription.
Sep 13th, 2007
abby
Penicillin is a girl’s best friend.
Sep 13th, 2007
ils vont...
That is some weird creepy shit. Why is jenna jameson all of a sudden popular? One day she just showed up and now she is everywhere.
http://www.ilsvont.com
Sep 13th, 2007
sonya
Those shoes look like what a blind elementary girl with one short leg might think are cute.
Sep 13th, 2007
eeks
OMG -
1 is famous for being a professional slut.
The other is famous… for being (ex-)friends with a famous slut and for leaking a sex tape out of herself online at that time.
WTF is WRONG with this country?
DISGUSTING.
And both are fug.
Sep 13th, 2007
Showgrrrl
Abby, do you know wtf is up with Jenna these days? She’s looking…. reaaaaallly unhealthy. And I also don’t understand the whole Tito Ortiz thing either - you’d think a guy would want to be cautious about where he sticks his penis, especially when mere photos of his beloved caused me to retch and then cautiously tiptoe back and forth in front of my screen because her eyes keep FOLLOWING ME! Jeebus.
If you could look into these things for me, it would be much appreciated!
Sep 13th, 2007
bulma
jenna looks like a freakin drag queen.
Sep 17th, 2007
MythMan J
This is another reminder of how being a pervert can be a positive thing.
Their bodies aren’t that bad … no ‘Vanessa Montagne’ among them, but they can do what they’re meant to!
“Faces” are just there to make emotion-reading easier anyway.
Sep 22nd, 2007
kyri
you are sexy
May 13th, 2008
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