Britney Spears Likes Drugs and Crazy Talk
Tags: Britney Spears
I’m sure you’ve been dying to know just what Britney Spears’ former bodyguard Tony Barretto could have told the judge last week to prompt court-ordered bi-weekly drug testing. Well, he told them a lot. Just, well, damn.
It all started the day of her comeback tour in Anaheim — Britney was spending the day with “musician” and fellow rehabber Howie Day — and hours before the show was supposed to start, a hysterical Britney called and said the tour was off. So Tony headed to the Mondrian Hotel to get her and found (via News of the World)
“Britney all red-eyed from crying. The hotel room was trashed. There were half-eaten plates of food everywhere. The entire place was littered with empty beer bottles and liquor bottles, small glasses of ice and cigarette butts everywhere. I could see mounds of white powder and a straw [on the dresser]. Britney was completely out of it. Her skin was all waxy. She looked so ill. My fellow bodyguard and Alli [Sims] wanted to get hold of a medic to detoxify her. We were panicking. We thought she was going to die.”
It wasn’t the only time Tony witnessed Britney with drugs. “I saw her snort white powder on two nights out at Teddy’s nightclub in LA,” he said.
But despite the penchant for partying, she was still a good mom, right?
“I was worried about the children due to her erratic behavior. She has a whiskey stash in her pantry—and even if the children are close by, that doesn’t stop her drinking. She wouldn’t talk to them at all and she would be in her own world looking completely out of it. She would be nervously chewing her fingernails and babbling away. She speaks to them in weird, creepy, baby voices, in made-up languages, which they just don’t get. All it does is unsettle, upset and scare them. Often she would scream and cry uncontrollably.”
I don’t have to wonder why Britney’s always crying. It’s because they’re always running out of peanut butter pie at Denny’s. Also, the gas station doughnuts never have sprinkles. Is it so much for a girl to ask that her doughnuts have some fuckin’ sprinkles? And don’t try to tell her she should just hit up the Krispy Kreme, because everybody knows that they don’t sell cigarettes or Red Bull or condoms at Krispy Kreme. That just wastes time. It’s the same reason she just buys the pastry bags full of peanut butter pie filling in bulk — you can squirt it directly into your mouth without have to chew or use utensils. Efficiency, baby. It’s the name of the Britney Spears game.
More of Britney looking fat and crying on Friday after the jump
17 Comments, Comment or Ping
open mouth jones
This is just too damn easy.
I’d insert the obilgatory comment about how even Lindsay and Paris don’t get THAT coke bloated, but that would be tired. God Britney, I never thought I’d just run out of nasty things to say about you or get sick of calling you fat, but you’ve proven me wrong.
My Lord, what is the world coming to?
Sep 24th, 2007
BarbadoSlim
“… room was trashed. There were half-eaten plates of food everywhere. The entire place was littered with empty beer bottles and liquor bottles, small glasses of ice and cigarette butts everywhere….”
Ah, reminds me of the one time a year the Slim can gets together.
Hi MOM! See you next Mother’s Day, whore.
Sep 24th, 2007
supes
She is so HOT! Its really attractive when a woman has flawless skin, a nose for fashsion, and has their life together. Its the trifecta. Mongo ears are a bonus too.
Sep 24th, 2007
RichPort
I’m tellin’ ya, Elton John is really looking like shit in these pictures…
Sep 24th, 2007
ravinglooney
I like to fill my condoms with peanut butter and jelly and suck all day long
Sep 24th, 2007
MSat
If those allegations are true, how could that judge allow those kids back into Britney’s home?
Sep 24th, 2007
MoreDiva
Only thing that comes to mind is total TRASH.
Sep 24th, 2007
open mouth jones
Like the alternative was any better? The stoned, ‘urban’, wannabe pimp of the year K-Fed? Puh-leeze.
The kids seriously have a better chance of surviving a trek through the herpes cavern of Paris Hilton than living with either of those genius’s.
Sep 24th, 2007
kdawg
You know, for a second there I ALMOST thought these were photos of Janeane Garofalo. Then I realized that even complete fashion disaster Garofalo would at least have the common sense to never mix a straw fedora/cowboy hat with a see-through knit top and a fat face full of tears.
Sep 24th, 2007
bionic bunny
what the hell is she crying about NOW??
the fact that she still has to keep the kids 50% of the time? or was the in-n-out closed?
Sep 24th, 2007
L.
Time to OD. Really, it’s for the best. Leave the kids some money.
Britney is a menace to everyone. Treat yourself to extra helpings of coke-meth-alcohol. BRIT, YOU DESERVE IT!
Sep 24th, 2007
Colin
She needs to be on serious medication for her apparent Manic Depressive Disorder. She tries to act cocky about everything and then cries. She should NOT have custody of those kids, they are being mentally abused by her unstability.
Sep 24th, 2007
Anderson
The bodyguard was mad because she didn’t screw him. The kids are mad because she doesn’t feed them. The mother is mad because she doesn’t give her money. The KFed is mad because she is dirty and the sister is mad because she wants to be WHORE #1, NOT #2.
Sep 24th, 2007
Bunnyhops
She is CRYING because she couldn’t get her skirt hiked up for the judge in time.
Sep 24th, 2007
BritneysTrash!
I think her kids should be released to her mother.
I dont think K-Fed Or Britney are good role models for them,
Hes a bloodsucking money hungry bast***
and I DO NOT KNOW what happened to her…She fell off the edge..
I just feel sorry for those two little boys and they are the ones suffering through all of this.
She needs to wake up and look at her children.
Oct 1st, 2007
BritneysTrash!
Okay I do feel sorry,
She lost costody..
BUT K-FED IS THE CAUSE OF ALL THIS…
Prior to K-Fed she was somewhat “normal”
(I always hated her)
But I have to speak the truth..
I think he had alot to do with the way brit brit is now..
And I will Keep her in prayer and hope that she turns her life around for her children.
Oct 2nd, 2007
arya
I don’t keep up but w/ Britney’s life but I agree that the kids should be released to their grandparents full-time. Parents should only get visitation.
Feb 2nd, 2008
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