Paris Supports the Troops
Tags: Paris Hilton
Halloween was last night, and I hope that you, like Paris Hilton, had enough decency to wear a slutty camoflauge corset “for the troops because they’re having a hard time right now and don’t really get to celebrate Halloween.” (Watch the above clip if you think I’m making that quote up.) Our boys overseas are too busy dodging roadside bombs and 14 year-olds armed with RPG launchers to go around with their tits and asses hanging out, carrying little pumpkin pails and pounding on Iraqi doors for handfuls of candy. I guess it’s all for the best, because over there you never really know when you might get a handful of smallpox or C-4 in your pumpkin instead of a Mr. Goodbar and some Skittles. Those Shiites are quite the pranksters! They really put the “trick” in trick-or-treat. Such a impish bunch, the Iraqis. I even heard the Kurds used to TP Sadaam’s palace every year and egg a few of his Benzes until he finally pumped them full of nerve gas and cyanide and cluster bombed the fuck out of their houses and like 70,000 of them died. Only I think they called it “Bloody Friday” instead of Halloween. But anyway, don’t worry, boys! Paris Hilton dressed like a whore ought to make your missing limbs and third-degree burns and partial brain damage all worthwhile. You can feel free to break into “God Bless the USA” anytime now.
9 Comments, Comment or Ping
BarbadoSlim
I dressed up the same way I dress for every Halloween: as a Filipino prostitute.
WHAT?
I don’t need to explain every little detail of my life to you people…
Nov 1st, 2007
celebretard
Paris should have worn a jail mate costume. That would have been funny. Has any one seen her FriendSpaceBook Profile. Its too funny http://www.friendspacebook.com/parishilton
Nov 1st, 2007
dannygutters
Wonky eyes and yellow contacts are a party DO.
Nov 1st, 2007
abby
Herpes and lipstick on the teeth? Check and check.
Nov 1st, 2007
Otto the Short Yellow Bus Driver
Lets send Parasite to Iraq, she would be our very own biological warfare weapon. Spread legs and dispense every known disease to mankind (and then some) onto the enemy. The war would be won and then we could bring our kids back home where they belong.
Nov 1st, 2007
scarlett
Tokyo Rose Hilton, a true patriot
Nov 2nd, 2007
kathleen
Thank you for this. Wish your commentary would appear on every “serious”
Web news site.
Nov 2nd, 2007
Roger Demi-Moore
For the after-party, she dressed as a malnourished Rwandan, “because they don’t get to go to many parties but they can see what they look like on HDTV.”
Nov 4th, 2007
Dap
The real G. I. Ho.
Sep 19th, 2008
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