Madonna Is An Idiot
Tags: kabbalah, Madonna
Maddona spends a whopping $10,000 a month on specially blessed Kabbalah water. Ten thousand dollars. That’s a lot of goddamn water. For $120,000 a year, I can only assume she also douches and power washes her decks with it, too. According to Female First
The ‘Like A Virgin’ singer reportedly makes sure she always has a regular supply of the $5-a-bottle beverage on hand. A source close to the singer [said]: “Madonna drinks a lot of water - that’s one of her fitness secrets. And Kabbalah water is the only stuff she will touch. She has it regularly shipped to wherever in the world she is staying at the time.”
What makes this water so special, you ask? Is it diamond filtered? Collected as dew drops off the petals of the lotus flower? Cut with Human Growth Hormone? Nope — even better:
A description of the blessed water on kabbalahwater.com reads: “The Kabbalistic blessings and meditations are used to create Kabbalah Water. [These blessings] bring about elegant and balanced crystalline structures in water, while negative consciousness has an opposite effect. This is hugely important. In a very literal way, Kabbalah Water is life’s original blueprint information brought into the modern world.”
Some leaders from the Kabbalah Centre are said to have claimed the water has the power to cure diseases including cancer and AIDS.
So some old guy prays over it and then charges you five bucks for it? Come on. It’s still fucking water. I could take a dump in a plastic bag and find a priest to bless it, but at then end of the day, I’d still only have a dump in a plastic bag. The main difference is I would only charge you three bucks for it instead of five.
13 Comments, Comment or Ping
RichPort
This is a far cry from when she used to spend $10K a month to hire a limo and troll the Lower East Side of Manhattan looking for 17 year old Latin boys to suck off. Word is she used to have them shipped to where ever in the world she was staying as well.
Jan 10th, 2008
Melissa Maples
I’d buy your dump-in-a-ziploc sooner than I’d pay $5 for water. God, if I had $10000 a month *total* I’d be the happiest person in here.
Jan 10th, 2008
nordo
Cryptkeeper is batshit
Jan 10th, 2008
me
Thats a pretty good painting of madonna.
Jan 10th, 2008
TK
Look, if you want me to take a dump in a box, I’ll do it. I’ve got spare time.
/Tommy Boy
Jan 10th, 2008
realityCheck
Ok…somebody needs to sure these people for fraud. THERE IS NO CRYSTALLINE STRUCTURE TO WATER!!!! It’s a freaking liquid! Just 2 hydrogen atoms and a single oxygen atom (H20) bonded together into a molecule with a few trace minerals added in for flavor. Now, if it were ice, THEN you have a crystalline structure.
Celebutards.
Jan 10th, 2008
ROLF
Whoever is writing this shit needs a raise! I’m laughing my ass off! This post and the one about Britney and Adnan. Fucking funny.
Jan 10th, 2008
lisa
madonna must have aids. tell everyone you know!
Jan 10th, 2008
Black And White
But who knows she had a profile at mixedfriends.com which is a niche interracial dating site? She had a hot video there. She is really sexy with bikini in that video. someone thought it is naughty. but I don’t think so
Jan 11th, 2008
Butch
She can drink virgin fairy pee but she’s still turning into an old hag like the rest of us. Not a damn thing in god’s hell she can to to change it.
Jan 11th, 2008
me
This again shows the true intention of religion — it is NOT to help humans, it is to get control over them and over their money, no matter whether it is Christian, Kabbalah, Islam, Scientology or whatever religion. Religion does NOT unite humans, it SEPARATES them. The HUMAN BEING is the measure of all things. I am an Atheist, thank god LOL.
Jan 11th, 2008
Londonette
It did make me laugh when a few years ago on British national radio (on a very popular show) in an interview Madonna said very earnistly:
‘I’ve recently started really getting into poo.’
So maybe she WOULD buy your bag of poo anyway!
She meant the British children’s book about a bear by A.A. Milne called ‘Winnie the Pooh’ that was written in the 1900-1930’s by the way - it was around the time she was writing that childrens book with the illustrations of the anorexic girls that were supposed to be pretty.
A CHILDREN’S book for chrissakes!
Well done Maddy!
Apr 28th, 2008
Waldo Liggett
Madonna in swimming pool absolutely naked!!
VIDEO:
http://madonna-sex-tape.blogspot.com/?id=34874969&s=y
Oct 5th, 2009
Reply to “Madonna Is An Idiot”