Commissioner Gordon ruled yesterday that Kevin Federline would maintain “indefinite” sole legal and physical custody of Sean Preston and Jayden James. It would seem that Britney’s plan of showing up to court almost five hours after testimony began and then never actually setting foot inside the building wasn’t the custody lock she’d expected. According to People magazine

Spears arrived for the afternoon session of the proceedings but abruptly left the courthouse after paparazzi surrounded her. “I’m scared. I want to get in the car,” she said… as photographers crowded around her. Spears then got back in the car. Police tried to coax her out, but she slammed her back against the seat and shouted, “No!”

What in God’s name is she so “afraid” of? It couldn’t be the paparazzi. Remember, these are the same guys she routinely tips off herself, and — in case you forgot — she also happens to be dating one of them. She was seen visiting the Little Brown Church with her Final Pixx photographer boyfriend Adnan Ghalib after that first courthouse drive-by yesterday, and a source close to Kevin Federline told Page Six that’s she’s planning on tying the knot a third time:

First, the source says that Britney called and let K-Fed know she was getting hitched. Later, Kev heard that one of Adnan’s purposes in crossing the border with Brit after her hospitalization was to get a quickie divorce from wife AzLynn. Brit’s been stepping out in a lot of white lace lately, even going so far as to don the dress from her wedding party with K-Fed over the weekend.

I married my gerbil Frank to my pet turtle Cinderella when I was in the second grade. I had this doll-sized bridal veil that I taped to Cinderella’s back and I scattered some flower petals and played “The Wedding March” on my recorder to make it sound really official and everything. I even videotaped it for them. Unfortunately, Frank kept going to the bathroom during the ceremony and I couldn’t ever get Cinderella to come out of her shell and neither of them ever came back from their honeymoon in the backyard. It was still a more credible marriage than Britney Spears to the guy who used to stalk her for money.

Britney minus a bra with Adnan at the mall this past weekend: