Gwyneth Paltrow Pregnancy Scare
Tags: chris martin, Gwyneth Paltrow, hospital, pregnancy
The Daily Mail attributes Gwyneth Paltrow’s recent weight lost and arduous fitness regime to her mysterious hospital visit on Monday, but rumors of a possible pregnancy are starting to surface elsewhere on the net. According to Rush and Molloy:
“[Husband Chris Martin and she] looked very serious,” a witness tells us. “She looked upset. They went right past everyone and into the elevator. It seemed like they were expected.” Our spy [also reported] that Martin and Paltrow entered Mount Sinai’s maternity wing, the Klingenstein Pavilion.
I’d say a baby sounds about right. You don’t usually go into the maternity ward with “bulimia” or “removing the giant stick from your pompous ass.” Just like you wouldn’t go to a proctologist for swollen tonsils and a sore throat. Not unless you want to find out the distance from your asshole to the back of your throat in medical tubing feet,1 that is. It’s not pleasant, believe me, but it’s a real conversation starter at parties.
1That’d be 26 feet and 11 inches, for those of you interested.
An unusually smiley Gwyneth leaving a pub in North London last month:
10 Comments, Comment or Ping
digglesworth
hey ding dong, that’s not a pub outside of north london, where did you get that? it’s in front of morandi in greenwich village … that’s in nyc in case you didn’t know.
Jan 16th, 2008
abby
hey digglesworth, that was the caption under the photos. What the fuck do I care where she eats.
That’s an “anorak” she’s wearing, in case you didn’t know. Or didn’t you care? You see my point. Who knows what she’s wearing or where she is. She might actually be dead.
Jan 16th, 2008
p0nk
i just saw on good morning america this morning that America is in a huge baby boom. 1 out of 4 is Latino, apparently the other 3 are celebs. jesus, jose, and maria! 15 years from now, with a million single parent celeb offspring, california is going to be ripe for judgment.
Jan 16th, 2008
p0nk
i thought anoraks were extinct…what?
Jan 16th, 2008
abby
I just like to say “anorak.” That’s actually just an ugly ass coat, no matter what continent she was on on the seventh of December last year.
Jan 16th, 2008
digglesworth
abby, come here and hump me in your anorak. afterwards we can eat at morandi’s, tho centro vinoteca is way better.
Jan 16th, 2008
abby
Done and DONE!
Jan 16th, 2008
sonya
Did someone say dong?
Jan 16th, 2008
bionic bunny
filthy celebrities!! think of all the poor little anorakies that must have died for her stupid coat.
somebody call peta!!
Jan 17th, 2008
Sylvia
Ahhh, now we know where the short bus stops! Hey there, cretins!
Jan 20th, 2008
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