Jessica Simpson Refuses To Be Dumped

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Star quarterback Tony Romo has finally comes to his senses and wants out of his relationship with Jessica Simpson and her creepy dad. OK! magazine says

On Jan. 17, Tony called Jessica at her L.A. home to try to break things off. “He said he thought it was better if they went back to being friends,” a pal of the singer tells OK!. “‘Tony has finally started to realize how high-maintenance Jessica is. We’re talking diva status. She comes with an entourage, and that includes her dad, Joe Simpson.”

But according to the pal, Jessica refused to give up. “‘Just friends’ is not in Jessica’s vocabulary. She knows how bad this will look in the media.”

Nothing warms a man’s a heart like desperation. In fact, when it comes to relationships, ladies, your ticket to lifelong happiness with a man centers almost exclusively around the ability to cling with a leech-like tenacity. Of course, if that isn’t working, you could always try anal. It has an almost 74% retention rate, even higher when coupled with a willingness to participate in threesomes and home videos. Signing over your paychecks and the title to your car works great, too. Then you can pull out the big guns and get yourself knocked up and start planning your wedding. It’s as good as an engagement ring, and he doesn’t even have to borrow your credit card to buy it!

Jessica in West Hollywood last week:

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8 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. sonya

    Most guys probably aren’t into threesomes with the girl’s dad.

    Smart man to get out while he did.

  2. p0nk

    she should take lessons from Brit and start dating the paps.

  3. Gingerly

    So she doesn’t want to end her relationship with the guy who only uses her to wodely recieve his sack in her endzone? Sorry, I just HAD to you a football sex pun.

  4. open mouth jones

    I can’t summon enough will to care.

  5. me

    Her teeth are very white.

  6. annoyed

    Even Stevie Wonder could see this coming. Jessica and her Dad tried to milk this for all it was worth and Romo probably tired of it and her.

  7. abby

    My guess? Ix-nay on the anal-nay. That’s code for “somebody cried.” It’s supposed to hurt!

  8. dood

    she needs to burn those jeans.

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