Amy Winehouse Still Planning On The Grammys

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Amy Winehouse was photographed leaving rehab yesterday a cup size bigger and looking like she’d actually slept, sparking rumors that she may have checked out of the Capio Nightingale clinic early. Not so, according to The Boston Herald:

Amy Winehouse, looking healthier than she has in a while, took a brief trip out of rehab yesterday to meet with officials at the American Embassy in London in the hopes of obtaining a visa and attend Sunday’s Grammy Awards in L.A. “She has not left rehab and remains under the care of the clinic,” her rep said. As of yesterday her rep said “no decision” had been made about a trip to California.

Pretty soon, Amy’s not even gonna need rehab. A pharmaceutical company in the U.K. has already developed a vaccine for cocaine, and the gene for alcoholism was identified almost four years ago. The user’s future is now, folks. That’s why I’m jumping on the wagon and getting a patent for my heroin addiction preventing robot. It’s just your average coffee can/paper towel tube/tin foil machine, but I made the eyes out of the stuff they use in glow sticks, so it looks really scary and evil. So there’s that, plus I cut out a hole where the person inside the robot can stick out a fist and punch the person on the verge of injecting. Or, I don’t know, hold his hand or change the channel or sign the words “USE YOU LOSE.” I haven’t really figured that part out yet. I’m banking on a delusional addict’s healthy fear of robot overlords to be the main selling point.

Amy looking less cracked out en route to the embassy:

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2 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. nordo

    She won’t be out of the woods until they come with the batshit lunatic vaccine which unfortunately counter-effects the freaking ugly vaccine but you can’t have it all

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