Scarlett’s New Tattoo Is Really Lame
Tags: other boleyn girl, premiere, Scarlett Johansson
Scarlett Johansson arrived at premiere of her new movie “The Other Boleyn Girl” in London yesterday with one of the gayest-looking tattoos I’ve ever seen. And right in the middle of her forearm, too, so there’s no hiding it unless she’s in long-sleeves or maybe a Technicolor Dreamcoat. I suppose it’s better than something trite like a Playboy bunny or a yin-yang, but it’s still pretty fucking lame. And then that got me to thinking — what are the lamest tattoos out there? The top ten lamest, to be exact?
10. Any Asian symbols or characters. You might think they stand for some profound Eastern philosophy when they really probably say “Kung Pao Chicken” or “I take it in the ass” in Korean.
9. Grateful Dead dancing bears. What a long, clichéd trip it’s been.
8. The Comedy/Tragedy Masks — comedy for us, tragedy for you
7. Anything with a wolf or predatory cat
5. Thug Life — unless you’re Tupac, you unoriginal bastard
4. Tribal arm bands. Sorry, you’ve now joined the ranks of Nick Lachey. Not cool.
3. Tribal arm band with dream catcher. Even gayer than the original.
2. Portraits of anyone. This goes double for portraits of Jesus with a crown of thorns.
1. Encrypted floor plans for a maximum security prison housing your wrongfully accused brother
32 Comments, Comment or Ping
Kelsey
Damn. It’s not just the design, it’s that it’s REALLY BADLY DONE. You’d think she’d be able to afford to go somewhere that’d do one with a -little- better line quality than your average prison tattoo — and tell her that that’s shit placement.
Feb 20th, 2008
syd
My little nephew’s lick & stick tats look better than that.
Feb 20th, 2008
abby
The officials of that site told me you suck donkey, newone.
Feb 20th, 2008
open mouth jones
I’ve seen more imaginative prison tats done with spit, kool aid and a nasty pen.
Feb 20th, 2008
sonya
That tatt is missing its unicorn.
Feb 20th, 2008
Anonymous 1981
Okay, I have a Chinese symbol tattoo, but only because I dragged my brother along who could confirm that it was indeed what they claimed it to be. Plus, it stands for Year of the Cock (my birth year), so that makes two reasons why I wanted it. Tee-hee :o)
Feb 20th, 2008
Bell Curve
All tattoos are a stupid idea that suggest to me an inability to imagine you might at some point in the future want to change you mind about something.
Feb 20th, 2008
RichPort
I get those kinda things stuck to my arms all the time… when I lean on my kid’s stickers.
Feb 20th, 2008
Sr Siete
Okay. But, to be fair, my brother has been placed in a very easy prison, making for a small tattoo.
Feb 20th, 2008
Tine
Dolphin tattoos should be on the list!
Feb 20th, 2008
sonya
How about Disney characters? On fat ankles?
Feb 20th, 2008
abby
I had to leave out “anything around the navel,” “shamrocks,” and “wizards” because I had to cut the list down to ten. But Disney characters on fat ankles definitely make honorable mention.
Feb 20th, 2008
Martina Newberry
It isn’t the tattoo, it’s the circle around it. It looks like one of those collector’s plates. Who did it, does anyone know? I got tatts because, if I couldn’t be beautiful, I could be a canvas for something that is beautiful, NOT because I couldn’t conceive of changing my mind. I love mine.
Feb 20th, 2008
Fargen Bastage
Anyone wanna take the bet (my $100 to your $1) that it’s not a real tattoo. It’s exactly what it looks like….a temporary stick-on kid’s tat.
–
FB
Feb 20th, 2008
ab
what about roses with thorns or hearts with anything written near/on them? Or any of the tatoos that girl Meagan Fox has, (that’s her name right?) she has the “we will all laugh at gilded butterflies” tatoo I believe, it always makes me laugh.
Feb 21st, 2008
lila
ugh, i have a grateful dead bear. there are way worse tattoos to have though. like dolphins, or roses, or anything circling an ankle (esp when the ankle is fat or unshaven), anything written in a different language when it is not your native language, one word sayings ie. “imagine” “believe” “love” “strenght” etc. the list goes on. i can admit to my lameness, but there are definitely some common tattoos that are equally as lame if not lamer.
Feb 21st, 2008
GooGoo
If I ever get a tattoo, it will be #9 on your list– a Grateful Dead dancing bear. Almost 13 years later, it still represents something important and unique. The tats are kind of like the covenant of circumcision– it connects Deadheads to one another.
Lila– ain’t no luck– I learned to duck!
Feb 21st, 2008
Dean Webster
Bell Curve, I am sure there are plenty of things about you that show your lack of intelligence, #1 being your Divine ability to judge others. Tattooes are not for everyone and obviously not you.
Feb 21st, 2008
Dean Webster
Fargen Bastage, I agree it is an amateur tat and a bad one at that. But I will take your bet.
Feb 21st, 2008
nordo
So then my smiley face is hip?
Feb 21st, 2008
matso
Looks like common Sharpie colors. Reminds me of the flamejob I drew around my ex-wife’s nipple, for a party we went to.
Feb 21st, 2008
open mouth jones
Nordo, it’s postmodern expression of irony, so OF COURSE it’s cool. Anything’s hip if you can give it a multisyllabic meaning.
Feb 21st, 2008
magenta
I am seriously missing the tramp stamp here - there simply isn’t a worse tattoo.
http://www.football-crazy.de/web/arschgeweih.jpg
Feb 21st, 2008
bionic bunny
i’ve done mehndi art (yes, really) for several years, but only traditional– and that looks like a bad colored mehndi/henna or whatever the crap they’re using now days. at least i hope so for her sake.
oh, and tribal tatoos are ultra cool if they are done in the trational fijian manner– with a rock and a sharp stick.
Feb 22nd, 2008
joe
“What a pig”. I at one point thought she had some class for such a young woman but you have got to be kidding me. She is just a kid upstairs in the nest. Hell, now she wants to get married to her dreamboat. Shit, she hasn’t even learned to pee yet!
Aug 28th, 2008
G
Maybe that’s exactly what she wanted. What do all of you care. It doesn’t say anything about her as a person or an actress or a beauty icon. If you have a personal problem with tattoos, thats an opinion that you shouldn’t impose on other people. Just to let you know, I feel a little like a hypocrite even writing something here
Nov 25th, 2008
G
P.S.-I remember now the reason I felt compelled to write something is that the person described the tattoo as “gayest.” Kill yourself for being so ignorant. That’s all
Nov 25th, 2008
Phil
Hey G, I think you landed on the wrong site. Try geriatricgossip.com, a site for humorless people.
Nov 26th, 2008
G
Humorless people? How bout you go to assholesunite.com, a site for judgmental people.
Dec 1st, 2008
Phil
assholesunite.com? Lol, now that’s the gayest site name ever. Pun intended.
Dec 1st, 2008
G
Ha, yes, you’re right, that one is pretty gay sounding….But what isn’t gay is the tattoo, unless you mean happy
Dec 6th, 2008
Megan
ugh, i have a grateful dead bear. there are way worse tattoos to have though. like dolphins, or roses, or anything circling an ankle (esp when the ankle is fat or unshaven), anything written in a different language when it is not your native language, one word sayings ie. “imagine” “believe” “love” “strenght” etc. the list goes on. i can admit to my lameness, but there are definitely some common tattoos that are equally as lame if not lamer.
LOL please don’t tell me you think your grateful dead bear is better than a one word saying in a foreign language. Or an ankle tattoo. For my 21st I’m thinking of getting a tattoo in Arabic ON MY ANKLE that’s ONE word- empathy. Why? Because I’m proud of my heritage, think the script looks pretty, and think empathy is an important thing to have.
Scarlett’s tattoo isn’t exactly lame itself, it’s just in a horrible location. It would look better on her lower back or shoulder blade. And if it were a bit smaller.
Jan 10th, 2009
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