Danica Patrick Breaks Indy 300 History

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Race car driver Danica Patrick became the first female ever to win the Indy Japan 300 on Saturday. Us Weekly reports

Patrick finished 5.8594 seconds ahead of former Dancing With the Stars champ Helio Castroneves on the 1.5-mile oval at Sunday’s race. It was her 50th Indy Car race.

Patrick became the first female driver ever to lead the race at the 2005 Indy 500, where she ended up coming in at fourth place.

That reminds me of this one time I made it straight through the state of Tennessee in less than an hour. And it’s 157 miles from Bowling Green to Huntsville, so you do the math. That’s pretty fucking fast. You divide the number of miles by the, uh, quotient ratio of minutes in an hour — carry the one and you get… math is for pussies who do the speed limit. Suckas!

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8 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. RichPort

    It just doesn’t matter how you photgraph her, she still looks like a hick.

  2. abby

    I was going to make the obvious joke about Asians being the only ones worse than women drivers. but I didn’t want to hear what a misogynist racist pig I am today. Not the right mood.

  3. RichPort

    I swear, cut her hair and her name is Cletus.

  4. sonya

    Cletus, the slack-jawed yokel!

  5. open mouth jones

    A really short cletus- the slack jawed yokel. err huh.

  6. nordo

    She just screams double-wide

  7. JMc

    if it takes 2 people and yourself to hold up the trophy for the race you just won you should automatically have to forfeit the race to the person that came in 2nd

  8. SCCA_Mazda_Driver

    abby,

    Damn right I’m gonna call you a “misogynist racist pig”.

    I drive for Mazda in the SCCA Run-Off series and I’m Asian.

    Come down to LA and I’ll show you how “bad” a driver I am.

    Tony

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