John Mayer Likes Whipped Cream and Feathers
Tags: Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer, sex
If you aren’t sufficiently sunburned and hungover from your Memorial Day weekend, allow me to make you hurt a different way: I present Jennifer Aniston’s and John Mayer’s sex life, in gruesome detail! Get ready for it to start burning when you pee. A source tells Star Magazine
The singer covers [Jennifer] with whipped cream, which he licks off, tickles her with feathers and uses ice cubes to give her goosebumps. John also likes to keep things interesting with games like role playing. He [is] kinky.”
Kinky my ass. “Kinky” is a zippered gimp mask, a couple of two-by-fours and a trapeze that doubles as a pillory, not Reddi-Whip and the trial-size bottle of warming personal lubricant that came free inside a box of Always with Wings. I liked that kind of erotic adventure better back in ‘86 when it was called “9 1/2 Weeks” and didn’t have a blues-roots-meets-pop sound and a feathered pompadour.
On the set of “Marley and Me” with Owen Wilson:
4 Comments, Comment or Ping
open mouth jones
Oh god. Ugh.
I just vomited.
All over my cube.
Thanks for the purge, abby.
You’re a DEAR.
May 27th, 2008
abby
Consider it my Memorial Day gift to you.
May 27th, 2008
wednesday
I doubt Jen would let anyone put something with calories on her.
May 27th, 2008
bionic bunny
maybe if he used them so she looked like big bird…
May 27th, 2008
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