Heidi Montag = Jesus
Tags: Heidi Montag, jesus
In what can only be described as a direct assault on the good name of Jesus, Heidi Montag has proclaimed to have a Christian album in the works. You know, because her earlier releases were such big hits. And the whole business about the Lauren Conrad sex tape? Just her cross to bear. She told USA Today
“There were rumors about a sex tape, but I had nothing to do with that. God knows the truth in all of this, and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters. Jesus was persecuted, and I’m going to get persecuted, ya know?”
Yep, when I think “Jesus,” I don’t see a sinewy guy with a crown of thorns being crucified on Calvary. Not at all. I see bleach blond hair and plastic tits and a frowny face on a MySpace page next to the words, “Why does Lauren have to drink the Haterade? Im praying 4 U Lauren!!!!!” I figure I ought to toss out my Bible for a subscription to Us Weekly and replace my crucifix with navel jewelry. Hosana in the highest? More like “Heidi-sana in the heidi-est!” Amen.
At LAX sans face paint June 11th:
6 Comments, Comment or Ping
sonya
Too bad she’ll never be persecuted like Jesus, because I’d like to see her try to resurrect herself from the dead.
Jul 1st, 2008
abby
I’d like to see her beaten with whips of broken glass and spat upon, but that’s just me.
Jul 1st, 2008
Brittany
I really have to start reading the comments more often. Those comments made me laugh as much as the story did!
Jul 1st, 2008
Fillup
I could cum in her beautiful blonde hair.
Jul 8th, 2008
Horatio
I want to fuck her until she cries and cum all over her..
Aug 7th, 2008
Sprmcandy
She may be a whore, but at least she is a Beautiful whore.
Sep 3rd, 2008
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