Quickies: Scattered, Covered, Smothered, Diced

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Scarlett Johansson stole Brooke Shields’ eyebrows. (Use My Computer)

Anne Hathaway’s secret diaries seized by the feds. (CelebNewsWire)

Lindsay and Samantha have a public quarrel! (MollyGood)

Ashlee Simpson lady lumps. (CelebWarship)

Girl fight: Fran Drescher vs Elisabeth Hasselbeck. (Allie is Wired)

Madonna is plagued with knee problems. I smell a blow job joke! (Holy Moly)

Mariah Carey as a 12 year-old hooker. (Hollywood Rag)

Megan Fox might be hot, but she’s also a crybaby ingrate cooze. (Websters)

For all my stoners out there — enjoy. (Robotzilla)

Bindi Irwin celebrates her birthday by… eating her dad? (Derek Hail)

Kid Rock Waffle House fight now on video! (The Rad Report)

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