So sorry to burst your bubble, Sam and Lindsay lovers, but Lindsay Lohan’s camp is denying the rumors that the two are getting ready to tie the knot. Digital Spy reports,

Lindsay Lohan has spoken out against rumours that she is to marry DJ Samantha Ronson.

Ronson reportedly stated at a recent gig that Lohan “will be Mrs Ronson” by the end of the year, while the actress has been spotted wearing a ring.

However, a spokesperson for Lohan commented that the jewellery does not signify anything, saying: “She bought [the ring] herself. It’s an antique ring that she found at an antiques store in NYC.”

Are you really surprised that a veteran penis connoisseur like the Hohan is ready to commit to a strap-on only? It’s the equivalent to Bruce the shark in Finding Nemo resisting his natural urges to eat fish. You can only take it so long before the sight of a penis is enough to make your eyes roll back in your head and drive you into a mindless humping frenzy. It’s just like watching Animal Planet!

Hohan and Sammy Longshanks at LAX