Tara Reid continues to be unfettered by societal standards of beauty. (Celebrity Smack)

Katy Perry says she planned to wipe the fuck out on stage last week! I wonder if she “planned” to be a no-talent hack, too. (Websters)

Here’s an important thing to remember when watching Max Payne: Marky Mark sucks donkey. (Pajiba)

Heidi Klum wants you to milk her. Sold! (Wizbang! Pop)

Kate Hudson and Liv Tyler come this close to making out. (Seriously? OMG)

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes take the plunge from “kinda creepy” to “downright terrifying” in matching men’s suit. (popbytes)

Raven Symone knows she’s fat — she just wants you to forget that you know she knows. (Celebitchy)

Carla Gugino or Lisa Rinna? You decide. (The Bastardly)

So I’m not the only one that finds Sarah Silverman painfully unfunny! (MollyGood)

Four clubs in six hours — a title only previously held by Lindsay Lohan. (Hollywood Rag)

Disney ushers in a whole new era of underage-scouting perverts with Selena Gomez. (Fatback)

What the fuck is Lindsay Lohan wearing on her chest? (The Grumpiest)