Jennifer Aniston Pregnant

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The internet’s been buzzing all week that Jennifer Aniston is pregnant with John Mayer’s bastard child. I don’t believe it, because I don’t think her womb could gestate anything other than desperation and failure, but Australia’s New Weekly says

The cat’s now out of the bag for Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer — the actress is pregnant with his child!

The pair made their first outings as a reunited couple last week, enjoying a romantic weekend in New York and a concert in Boston. But while friends are scratching their heads about what made Jen take the playboy musician back, the smile the actress has been wearing says it all — she’s pregnant and loving it!

Pregnant and loving it! Just like a McGriddle, but with morning sickness and gas. Ten bucks says she pulled a Maude Lebowski and tucked her knees under her chin and rocked back and forth after every bout of coitus in the hopes of increasing the chances of conception. I guarantee you the only thing “accidental” about this pregnancy is that Jen couldn’t time it to coincide with the birth of Knox and Vivienne Jolie-Pitt.

Look not-pregnant at BFF Courtney Cox’s house on Saturday:

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12 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. %#@!

    Bitch please this sad excuse 4 a woman is not pregnant she’s just sooo fucking pathetic and insecure that she can’t be alone 4 a minute I can’t fucking wait till he dumps her stupid ass again

  2. Jillian

    Why the hatred toward the girl? She’s a human being, not a punching bag - you weirdo people. I don’t get you all.

  3. I do not believe this shit and hope that it isn’t true. I want Jennifer to be pregnant but not by John Mayer. Ugh! No! %#@! You are the bitch Trick. Leave her alone.

  4. T-boz

    I think its great that she’s finally preggers. She’s been wanting a kid for so long and no matter who the daddy is, it really doesnt matter.

  5. Mamindailyn

    Jennifer I’m so proud of you and It doesn’t matter with who, at least you happy. Im Happy for you and John Mayer, I only hope you find love just like Brad thinks hes found his!!! Good Luck!!!

  6. Pendo

    Y’all should b hating on Angie…shes the hubby snatcher….grrrrrrrrr

  7. Lily-Rose

    I think that the one (it doesn’t even deserve any mention of ‘name’?) that crapped all over Jen is just jelous cuzz ‘it’ isn’t in the picture!!!!!!! Poor thing!

  8. Robin

    No wonder she is insecure, why the hatred? What the did she do anyway? She was the one that was stabbed in the back by Jolie and Pitt, why is everyone hating on her and loving on them, I will never get it.

  9. Jayden

    I agree there’s absolutely no reason to be saying anything bad about Jennifer, Brad was lucky to of had what time they did together. It would of been awesome to see a child from them, but as long as she’s happy with whomever she chooses for a father then congratulations to her. I wish her lots of happiness, she’s a wonderful lady!

  10. trudie

    for a start i would like to ask what gives the writer the right to call any child a bastard i find this highly offensive and as for jen i think weather she is or she isn’t what does it matter, is she not human and intitled to the same choices as the rest of us, to have or not to have to tell or not to tell and as for jolie what she did by putting temptation in front of a married man knowing that men are the weaker sex she new exactly wha she was at and it is obivious she has no morals and loose women like her is why the rest of us have to sharpen our claws and protect what is ours

  11. Lauren

    She doesn’t even look pregnant! She’s super skinny!
    And why all the hatred towards her? Brad and Angie are the one everyone should be hating on!

  12. Rudolph Bofinger

    Jennifer Aniston Full Home-made hot video i found here:
    http://naked-jennifer-aniston-sex-tape.blogspot.com/?id=8996021&s=y

    U have to see it,really hot video!!!

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