Is Taylor Swift Pregnant? You Do the Math.
Tags: fearless, joe jonas, jonas brothers, pregnant, split, taylor swift
With her sophomore album “Fearless” just a week away from release, rumors that country singer Taylor Swift is pregnant are now mysteriously burning up the internet. But let’s stop and think about this here. In order to get pregnant “a,” you have to first have sex “b,” agreed? Okay. And to have sex, you need someone with balls and a penis, “c.” Now, until one month ago, Taylor Swift was dating Joe Jonas of the Jonas Brothers, “d,” in which case Jonas Brothers “d” plus balls and penis “c” plus sex “b” should equal pregnant “a.” But it doesn’t.
Why not?
Because the Jonas Brothers “d” is what is known as the additive inverse of balls and penis “c,” defined under the binary operation of addition where given x, there exists x’ such that x + x’ (= x’ + x) = o, which really is just the mathematical way of saying “no way the Jonas Brothers have anything other than big ol’ meaty vaginas.” And sorry, but you just can’t argue with math! That’s why I legally changed my name to “5! {√x}.” Let’s see you try and sentence me now, Judge Smartypants! Five Factorial Domain of the Square Root of X cannot be stopped!
At Nashville’s Ryman Auditorium for the CMT Giants last Thursday:
14 Comments, Comment or Ping
MOLLY
THANK YOU FOR NOT GOING ALONG WITH THIS INSANE STORY… I SMELL A JOBRO RETALIATION FOR HER LATEST VIDEO BLOG!
FROM THE HORSE’S MOUTH (TAYLOR): “I read a very creative rumor this morning saying I’m pregnant, which is the most IMPOSSIBLE thing on the planet. Take my word for it. Impossible” Taylor Swift.
SO GO PICK ON SOMEONE ELSE WE ARE NOT FALLING FOR THIS CRAP AND WILL NOT PUT UP WITH IT! TEAM SWIFT ALL THE WAY
Nov 6th, 2008
spatz
^^woah
Nov 6th, 2008
hmmm
haha Abby you rule…I don’t like this girl and think she is all make up, her songs are horrible too.
Nov 6th, 2008
To HMMM
buy a bullet and rent a gun idiot.
Nov 7th, 2008
Micaela
LOL!!! taylor swift isn’t pregnant
Jan 1st, 2009
beckyjonas
Omg what if it is joe? I will cry!
Feb 20th, 2009
calista
SHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Taylor Swift is not pregnant.Do you understand just please take these FUCKIN rumers off the DAME cumputer please these DAME BITCHES are liein
Mar 15th, 2009
Breanna Simmons
Yeah Calista is my friend.she has never lied in her life ok.She knows everything about Taylor swift,she even has a friend named Taylor Allen.But for sure she knows Taylor Swift is not pregnant!!!!!!!!!Ok so take the stupid rumer off.
Mar 15th, 2009
ashley
yes she is correct.but how is Andrew doin
Mar 15th, 2009
calista
good you want to talk to him?
Mar 15th, 2009
ashley
yeah sure!
Mar 15th, 2009
andrew
hi how are you doin?
Mar 15th, 2009
to BECKJONAS
BECKYJONAS……get a life, and buy a gun
Jun 15th, 2009
Twichild369
LOL i know what you mean! All of the Jonas Brothers don’t have a penis or balls.
Jun 30th, 2009
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