Here’s one you didn’t see coming: washed up whore and sloppy drunk Tara Reid is in rehab. Surprise, surprise, surprise! According to People Magazine

The actress’s rep [said], “Tara Reid has checked herself into Promises Treatment Center. We appreciate your respect to her and her family’s privacy at this time.” The rep would not reveal what Reid, 33, is being treated for.

A friend of the troubled actress says, “She checked in herself – it was her decision.”

What oh what could her malady be? I’m pretty sure Promises doesn’t treat plastic surgery addiction. But what about penis addiction? Or testicles-on-my-chin addiction? Or anal-if-you-buy-me-drinks addiction? I’m pretty sure those aren’t real vices. And besides, I listed them as “strengths” on my resume, right under to “Level 61 Night Elf Druid” and “Skee Ball High Score Holder at the Cloverleaf Mall arcade.” How did you think I got this sweet gig, talent? Not hardly!

Checking into Promises:

Photo credit: SPLASH NEWS