Heart Truth’s annual Red Dress show happened at Bryant Park today for Mercedes Benz Fashion Week.  Things got off to a swimming start with a mile and a half of hot leg, then leveled off for awhile before quickly devolving into a Golden Girls nightgown parade and finally culminating in a bobble-headed, hot tranny mess.

Amanda Bynes strutted those stems out:

Jennie Garth looked pretty darn cute (she and Amanda Bynes have the most adorable rapport — they were on some dumb show together for years):

Hilary Duff didn’t look bad, really, but she’s definitely looked better.  I think this shade of red is wrong for her, and this style of dress would’ve suited her better in a shorter length:

Daisy Fuentes looked pretty good for someone I didn’t even know was still alive:

And now, a little something for the cougar hunters in the audience…  Here are Susan Lucci, Patricia Arquette, and Katie Couric:

Lastly, hoo boy… Tori Spelling is not particularly well-favoured to begin with, but goddamn does she look awful with her gigantic melon perched on top of this wee skeletal frame (and someone needs to tell her that the 16 pounds of spackle on her face totally do not count toward her body weight).  Eat a sandwich, woman!  With a side of fries!