The father of John Graziano — the young marine left in a vegetative state after Nick Hogan’s 2007 car crash — was arrested yesterday for hiring a hit man to kill his estranged wife. Edward Graziano reportedly attempted to pay the hit man with a personal check and a thirteen-dollar gift card to a local pizzeria. You can’t make this shit up. According to TMZ

According to police, Edward Graziano told an undercover officer posing as a “go-between” to a hit man that he wanted to have his wife Debra killed. Perhaps most troubling — cops say Graziano wanted her killed in an automobile accident.

Graziano allegedly paid for the hit with $1,100 cash, a $1,000 personal check and a $13.06 gift card to Westshore Pizza.

$13.06 in coupons may not sound like much, but you have to take into consideration that Westshore pizza joint makes a killer Sicilian-style pie. They use real pecorino cheese and everything. I’d say that’s gotta be worth at least one human life, maybe two if they bypass traditional dough for focaccia. It’s not really fair to judge ’till you know all the facts.