That’s supposed to be Drew Barrymore on the cover of W magazine, underneath all the airbrush and photoshop. (Right Celebrity)

Paris Hilton whores it up on the beach with her pusswhiff boyfriend. (Holy Moly)

Miranda Kerr couldn’t possibly look any more beautiful than she does right here. (Bastardly)

Michael Stipe has completed his transformation into angry garden gnome. (TMZ)

Annalynne McCord gets rammed from behind — and here are the pictures of the whole sordid event! (Socialite Life)

DJ AM is cursed. (CelebSlam)

Reese Witherspoon definitely looks pregnant — is Jack Bauer’s magnificent “Jack Sack” to blame? (Lainey Gossip)

Why is Julia Roberts swearing off sex forever? (Celebitchy)

Miley Cyrus might die soon. If only we could be so lucky. (Fatback)

Hayden Panettiere continues her campaign of twattiness on the set of “Heroes.” (CelebNewsWire)

See Wheel of Fortune’s Vanna White naked! (CityRag)

Rosario Dawson does her best dominatrix and dirty school girl in Complex magazine. (Celebrity Odor)

James Franco finally invents the invisible dick-sucking machine that has eluded us for so long! (CelebWarship)

The source of the text that instigated the Chris Brown beating has been revealed — and it’s his 40 year old manager! (Websters)

The Most Unfortunate Incidents of Male Nudity, starting with that time your dad forgot to cinch up his bathrobe. (Pajiba)

L’il Kim tests the tensile strength of spandex in a bodysuit. (Pacific Coast News)