Victoria Principal, the woman who played Pamela Ewing on the hit TV show Dallas, is being sued for assault, false imprisonment and emotional distress by her former maid, Maribel Banegas. TMZ says

Banegas claims she had taken the dog for a walk — when she returned home to an enraged Victoria who couldn’t understand why it took so long.

Banegas explained the dog wouldn’t poop, but Victoria wasn’t [satisfied]… and fired Maribel on the spot. Maribel asked for her final check and Victoria went upstairs, allegedly only to come down with a gun, “which she then pointed and aimed” at the maid.

Victoria “verbally threatened to kill plaintiff”… and asked another housekeeper who was present “to stand aside in order that she could kill the plaintiff.”

Expect Victoria to countersue when it’s revealed next season that the whole maid incident, like Bobby Ewing’s death, had just been a dream.

UPDATE: TMZ is saying that Victoria Principal has filed a counter lawsuit, admitting she did pull a gun on her former maid, but only after the maid flew into a rage and “struck and injured another maid in the house, [kidnapped] Victoria’s small dog and [demanded] money.” I can’t prove it, but if there’s anything countless hours of daytime television have taught me, it’s that Stefano DiMera is probably behind it. And also that I might have an evil twin intent on stealing my baby and raising it as her own. It happens more often than you would think.

Victoria’s Secret models Miranda Kerr and Bar Rafaeli at the Costume Institute Gala because they’re not old and disgusting: