Wait, what?  I thought these bitches broke up last year?  Whatever.  Apparently they’re still happening, or re-happening or some shit, because here’s Drew Barrymore and Justin Long at a Green Day concert together last night.  Anyway, that’s not even really the point.  Let’s focus on what’s important here and talk about what in the holy hell Drew’s wearing.  I get that Drew’s all kooky and eccentric and generally very fond of dressing like it’s no later than about 1987 and it’s all just part of her hippy dippy charm, and that’s probably for the best because without all that she’d just be a mediocre actress with a speech impediment and abominable taste in men…

The hell was my point?  Oh, yeah.  The outfit.

Drew.  DUDE.  For serious, what are you wearing?  No, I mean it.  Look at yourself:

Is that a table cloth rigged together with a pair of my grandpa’s suspenders?  Why is there a gingham napkin wrapped around your neck?  And why is there a bird on the inside of your elbow?  Jesus, I hope that’s magic marker, because it’s one of the dumbest things I’ve ever seen so I’d hate to think it won’t wash off.

The most reasonable explanation I can come up with for this situation is that Drew was at some sort of picnic, and she was high as a goddamn kite and she saw a pretty bird, and she really wanted a picture of the bird but she was so stoned that she forgot cameras had been invented, so she drew a picture of the bird on her arm, and then there was skinnydipping and some nefarious character came along and stole her clothes from the pile on the shore, and so she was forced to MacGyver an outfit for herself with the contents of the picnic basket.  She’s so resourceful!