Mariah Carey was already shitfaced last night when she arrived at One Little West 12th in the wee hours of the morning to guzzle champagne with her entourage. Page Six says

According to a witness, Carey showed up to the restaurant at “1:30 a.m. and was quite out of it. When she exited her black Maybach, she tripped twice and had to grab hold of one of her guards so she wouldn’t fall. She ordered a bottle of champagne but she could barely speak.”

A source close to the singer tells Page Six, “She was probably wobbly because she was wearing 7-inch Louboutins. That’s tough to do.”

Yep, that’s it. Her feet were tired. Just like that time my head was tired and the cops tried to tell me I had blacked out and faceplanted on the sidewalk. Drunk and disorderly my ass! My head just needed a little rest was all. I’m pretty sure I had used it for a lot of thinking and stuff that day.