A German model was charged Thursday with trying to extort $100,000 from Cindy Crawford by using a “sexy” photo of the supermodel’s then-7-year-old daughter Kaia “in revealing clothing, bound to a chair and gagged.” The picture, reportedly stolen from the Crawford’s former nanny, was simply part of an innocuous “cops and robbers” game the nanny claims to have played with the children. Yeah, that’s normal. The NY Daily News says

[German model and the nanny's ex-boyfriend] Edis Kayalar [initially] told Crawford and Gerber [back in July] that he was broke and wanted a reward for returning the photo, portraying himself as a “good guy.”

Gerber met Kayalar and Kayalar handed the photo over. Gerber gave him $1,000 for his “trouble.”

But Kayalar contacted the couple two days later, allegedly claiming he still had a copy of the photo and threatening to sell it to a tabloid for $500,000.

Crawford and Gerber went to the cops, who picked up Kayalar. He was turned over to immigration officials, who booted him from the country in September because he was here illegally.

Well, all’s well that ends well, right? Um, not exactly…

The couple thought their nightmare was over until Nov. 1, when Kayalar e-mailed them from Germany with new threats of selling the photo to a tabloid if they did not pay him $100,000.

Kayalar allegedly gave Gerber a German bank account number and routing information, saying the money should be wired within three days or the photo would be made public.

As of Thursday night, Kayalar had not been arrested. Authorities were searching for him in Germany.

Well, if you don’t want sexy bondage pictures of your second-grader on the internet, DON’T LEAVE THEM WITH FUCKING STRANGERS WHILE YOU GO GALLIVANTING AROUND EUROPE!!!! Just like you don’t leave your kids on the railroad tracks while you run errands and you don’t give them a dry cleaning bag and a handgun to occupy them while you touch up your makeup. Jesus Christ. Am I taking crazy pills? It seems so common sense to me! And for the record, I’m pretty sure that “au pair” is actually French for “shitty parent.” Look it up.

Cindy with her daughter in Hawaii last year:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News