Alessandra Torresani rocks an Italian camel toe in her new video. (Dirty Rotten Whore)

9021-Oh hell yes: Jessica Lowndes doing what she does best. (Moe Jackson)

The kids that broke into Paris Hilton’s home stole her coke stash. But not her Valtrex or Herpecin HCL. (Hollywood Rag)

Kelly Brook looks beautiful even fully clothed. Bitch. (UseMyComputer)

Asshole watch 2010: Zac Posen refuses to be photographed with The Count from Sesame Street. I see one, ONE douchebag! Ah ah ah ah! (Socialite Life)

Where do you go to celebrate your marriage if you’re Katie “Jordan” Price and Alex Reid? Why, a strip club, of course! Presuming the Suck Shack was already booked. (Holy Moly!)

Break out the hair gel lubricant, because naked Snooki pics are coming your way! (CelebNewsWire)

Nick Jonas says Bob Dylan can’t sing. Bob Dylan responds with “Nick Jonas can’t reproduce because he doesn’t have any testicles.” I might have made that last part up. (Litely Salted)

Taylor Swift’s manager addresses her “Grammy issues” (re: godawful live performance with Stevie Nicks). (Allie is Wired)

Why is Pink dressed like a woman? (Seriously? OMG)

Tiger Woods escapes from sex rehab! (CelebJihad)

Miley Cyrus’ kid sister isn’t designing a lingerie line for fourth graders. It’s for eight year olds, dummies! (Gone Hollywood)

Beyonce’s new perfume commercial may be the shittiest thing I’ve seen all week. (popbytes)

Who is the New Orleans Saints’ boob girl? (COED Magazine)

The holy trinity of monster douchebags. (The Dirty)