Tiger is in Rehab for Drugs Now

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Now that he’s finished with sex therapy, Tiger Woods has checked into The Meadows treatment center in Arizona to kick his addiction to painkillers and sleeping pills. The New York Post says

Woods’ drugs of choice are said to be the sleep medication Ambien and painkiller Vicodin.

“In [sex] therapy, Tiger blamed a lot of his cheating behavior on his drug addiction, saying that the drugs were responsible for impairing his judgment,” an anonymous source [said].

The golfer’s lovers have said he enjoyed mixing Ambien and sex to heighten pleasure.

I can barely point the car in the right direction when I’m wacked out on painkillers, much less hit a tiny ball with a little stick and make it land within three feet of a hole 200 yards away from me. The inside of Tiger’s head must look like the goddamn targeting system of a F-14 Tomcat.

6 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. RebelBoy

    PLEASE GO AND DIE SOMEWHERE YOU PATHETIC, CHEATIN’ DRUGGY, PROFESSIONAL ASSHOLE!

  2. Ann

    Tired of hearing about this mess. He’s done.

  3. anony

    Sexaholic.
    Pill pusher.
    He still has Workaholics Anonymous to go.
    And then, I’m guessing, Gamblers Anonymous….

  4. Ann

    Anony, don’t forget the big one “Liars Anonymous”
    That should take awhile.

  5. Roadside

    Being an alleged Buddhist (on his mother’s side) is slightly suspect. He needs to come out as a devout Christian.

  6. Jon

    Just FYI, the F-14 hasn’t been in service in years.

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