The greatest “SFW Gasparilla 2011 Dude Getting Blown” video you’ll see all day! Sorry, I have no idea what that means. (Busted Coverage)

But my real estate agent acted like the sex toys were a liability. (Brobible)

Fuck you, Cheryl Burke! Oh, wait… I thought they were talking about Dancing with the Stars, not her bikini. Well, fuck her anyway. (Jezebel)

The marijuana scene has been edited out of Miley’s new movie! Can’t imagine why. She’s so cool when she’s high. (Pop Crunch)

Vanity Fair’s annual Hollywood issue includes plenty of Olivia Wilde side boobage and lots of Mila Kunis leg action. (The Fab Life)

Charlie Sheen’s family is about to pull a Britney-style conservatorship on his ass. (Hollywood Rag)

Rihanna’s new S&M video is as cliched and predictable as you thought it’d be. Not that it’s gonna stop you from watching it. (Celebs)

Which Gossip Girl was voted the Most Desirable Woman of 2011? Hint: not the right one, that’s for damn sure. (Anything Hollywood)

Christina Applegate gives birth to a baby girl from her own uterus, not a surrogate’s. It’s practically unheard of in Hollywood these days. (Gone Hollywood)

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Victoria’s Secret swimsuit special. Yes, please. (Moe Jackson)

Don’t click. Just don’t. Okay, do, but remember I warned you first. And maybe just peek through your hands. (The Dirty)

Rihanna in a bikini in Hawaii. (G Celeb)

Barbara Walters all but calls Kelsey Grammer’s ex-wife Camille a frigid, manipulative snake with no soul. Looks like somebody’s Team Frasier! (Bitten & Bound)

Charlotte Church should NOT wear a bikini. Ever. (The Grumpiest)

Brazil boos Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. Just like me! Only they did it where they could actually hear it. Slightly more impressive. (Holy Moly!)

Reason number two I will not being seeing the new Superman movie: Kristen Stewart is in the running to be Lois Lane. As if Kate Bosworth weren’t bad enough a few years ago. (Allie is Wired)

Raven Symone’s sure-to-be-canceled triumphant return to television! (ONTD)

Jessica Alba’s ass in a bikini because it’s Jessica Alba’s ass in a bikini. (Use My Computer)

Gwyneth Paltrow is sad because people on the internet are mean to her. Suck it, bitch! (Bricks and Stones)