In a real-life Beauty and the Beast story, Scarlett Johansson and Sean Penn continued their love-in south of the border. Please, hold your dry heaving until the end of the story.  Says Us Magazine,

The actress, 26, and new love Sean Penn, 50, kicked off a steamy 24-hour getaway at the Las Ventanas al Paraiso resort in Cab San Lucas, Mexico, March 2.

“They were acting like teenagers in love and were all over each other,” a source tells the new issue of Us Weekly (on stands now). “Kissing a lot and chain smoking.”

After retreating to their $3,860-a-night ocean-front suite, the handsy duo didn’t emerge until 2:00 the following afternoon for a liquor-loaded lunch at the hotel’s Sea Grill (three margaritas and a shrimp cocktail for her, three pina coladas and lobster for him).

“She’s head over heels,” a source says of Johansson.

The twosome then returned to their room for three more hours of alone time before boarding a private jet to L.A.

Sounds like a match made in heaven. If your definition of heaven is kissing a cigarette-flavored, dehydrated bullfrog who probably has heartburn (because old people always have indigestion) and is burping up pina colada-infused lobster. Swoon! Add a case of Montezuma’s revenge and you just have attained nirvana.

Kelly Brook in leggings, because she doesn’t inspire feelings of nausea: